Copyright © 2005, 2006 by William R. Mistele.  All rights reserved.                                   

 

                

A Pop Quiz for Magicians, Parts I-XI (from Intro to Magic 101), Plus FAQ and Bio (at the end)

 

(Somewhat on the lighter side as in humorous; but be careful what you wish for.  The intent is not to inspire but to encourage people to think and also to laugh.

      Often individuals take sides or start with assumptions or a point of view and perspective.  On the other hand, any fledgling telepath knows right away that there are many points of views and alternatives with most questions. Or, as the higher spirits like to point out, “It all depends on how you ask the question and for whom the answer is intended.”)  

 

Note: In the later sections are interviews, talk shows, debates, minor evocations, explorations, and even a Mid Term Exam which you are all welcome to sit in on, etc.

 

Note 2: These pop quizzes belong to a class held at the Magic University.  Magic 101is a freshman class and a general introduction to magic, to the meaning of life, the universe, and to everything else. 

     Included along with the actual quizzes used to facilitate classroom discussions are interviews, radio talk shows, debates, field trips, a mid term exam, various brief evocations, poetry contests, and conversations between students and professors during office hours and during independent studies.

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE TRUE ABOUT MAGIC?

 

Magic is the highest wisdom on earth.

 

Magic is the highest science on earth.

 

Sex magic is the highest magic on earth.

 

Magic and science produce the same results.  They just use different methods.

 

Magic has been kept secret from the public and is highly restricted during this divine dispensation because of the way it was abused during previous civilizations.

 

There are two tests for studying magic—1. You must be convinced that you can correct whatever mistakes you make along the way and 2. You believe you are pure enough to avoid abusing your power.  (If you are not bothered by making mistakes and abusing your power, then these two points do not apply.  Instead refer to the classic text, The Final Test if the Dark Side is Your Quest.)

 

Ninety-seven per cent of the magic practiced on earth is “pretend” magic. The only genuine test of magic is if you have used it to significantly transform the world in a positive manner.  (Note: Generally speaking, house rules do not award points for using magic to destroy things.  It is too easy, there is too much of that kind of activity, and so we have decided to acknowledge only creativity.)

 

Magic is the study of how to make the best choices in life.

 

To be a magician you have to become a spiritual being.  Your commitment must be absolute so you carry no doubts.  And there must be a place within your spirit which is free of all fear.  (From The Undine Osipeh).

 

 

WHICH IS THE MOST LIKELY QUESTION OR

COMMENT PEOPLE WILL MAKE ABOUT YOUR STUDYING MAGIC

 

Is there any money in it?

 

You mean you’re pulling rabbits out of hats?

 

Shouldn’t you be looking for answers in the Bible?

 

Can you use it to find a sex partner?

 

Didn’t magic go out of fashion five hundred years ago when people gave up trying to turn lead into gold?

 

I always knew you were weird.

 

 

THE HERMETIC MAGICIAN FRANZ BARDON EXPECTS STUDENTS TO ACCOMPLISH WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING?

 

Develop a level of concentration so that like the movie director Steven Spielberg they can imagine an entire movie unfolding before their eyes including all of the characters’ actions, feelings, and words.

 

Develop the concentration of an advanced Zen Master who can stop all thoughts from appearing in his mind at will whenever he wants and for as long as he wants.

 

Develop the level of vitality of a sixth don Aikido master, a grand master of Tai Chi Chuan, or an advanced yogi.

 

Develop a level of psychological analysis and self-understanding equivalent to having several Ph. D’s in psychology. 

 

Develop mastery over the electric fluid so that you can keep your flashlight working when the batteries go dead.

 

Be able to dissolve all negative energy from a magical attack simply by placing your hand in a bucket of water.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS TRUE ABOUT TELEPATHY?

 

Telepathy involves reading the exact thoughts occurring in another’s mind as they happen.

 

Telepathy never involves reading the exact thoughts in another’s mind as they are occurring.  Instead, telepathy is art—as in any form of translation, there is always a degree of difficulty and always an element of interpretation.

 

The best way to begin practicing telepathy is by transmitting and receiving sensory impressions involving smell since smell gives the strongest sensations.

 

In telepathy, a single impression sent from a spirit can be received/perceived in either visual, auditory, or sensory sensations and can contain the equivalent of volumes of books.

 

The best way to begin practicing telepathy is by sending a little white ball of energy from your forehead to your partner’s forehead containing a single impression you wish to communicate. 

 

Telepathy, like all magic, entails a lot of listening and a little technique.  (Peter Beagle)

 

You have to establish a “listening silence” before anything will happen.  (Eugene Gendlin)

 

Join your mind and the mind of another so they are one and you won’t have a problem with communication or interpretation. (Bagoloni—earthzone spirit)

 

The best way of learning telepathy is to practice turning on and off an electric train using a galvameter hooked up to a plant and an electric switch.

 

And now for a word from one of our spiritual anthropologists: “Though she and I sometimes speak aloud with words for the sake of dramatic effect, no thought or image is needed when we communicate.  She speaks as a harpist communicates moods through the touch of her fingers on the strings of her harp--but the strings are my nerves and the moods she creates are a flow of love from her heart into my own.” (from the undine Istiphul)

 

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING INDICATES THAT MAGIC IS REAL AND STILL HAS AN ACTIVE ROLE TO PLAY IN OUR WORLD?

 

A team of scientists consults with you for a $30 million contract they have with Boeing Aircraft for developing an antigravity engine for airplanes.

 

The CIA consults with you on why their death ray device works using only a radionics diagram of a machine rather than the actual machine.

 

The Pentagon consults with you on their secret experiments for strengthening the steadily weakening North Atlantic current that is the only thing preventing the return of an ice age.

 

After taking a course on “remote viewing” with a former CIA operative, you can now “locate” your car keys when you misplace them.

 

Your cat and dog come when you call them telepathically. 

 

You sell your “dragon slaying sword” from your on-line role playing game for $800 on eBay.

 

You discover you can turn on an electric train from anywhere on earth by sending a telepathic message to a plant hooked up to a galvameter and the electric train switch.

 

Steven Hawkin consults with you because astrophysicists still can not locate ninety-five per cent of the matter in the universe that is missing and that emits no radiation detectable by scientific instruments.

 

The company stock (Netease [ADR]) you bought that runs Chinese on-line role playing magic games doubles in value netting you a cool ten grand.

 

Like the Televangelist, Pat Robinson, you convince yourself that you can control the direction of hurricanes.

 

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WOULD BE A SUITABLE STORY INVOLVING NATURE SPIRITS?

 

A sylph falls in love with a human poet and assumes the form of a woman to be his lover.  But she later falls victim to the racial and religious bigotry of that society.

 

A male magician falls in love with an undine who “borrows” the body of a human woman to become his lover—things may or may not work out in this one.

 

A powerful magician wagers that will is greater than love in attempting to take possession of one of the queen of undines.

 

One of the highest ranking female sylphs tries to outsmart a powerful wizard who has managed to encase her in a jar.

 

A powerful salamander (also called a genie) becomes attached to a lamp and is forced to grant wishes. (Aladdin)

 

An advanced gnome enjoys bargaining and trading rare magical items with human magicians down through the ages.

 

A man suspects that his lover, though possessing the form of a woman, may actually be a mermaid who was traded for a human child.  As the man probes deeper into this mystery, he discovers ancient forms of magic that lead into the mysterious realms of nature spirits. 

 

ASSIGN THE FOLLOWING KINDS OF BEINGS TO THEIR CORRECT DESCRIPTIONS--SALAMANDERS, SEALES, UNDINES, GNOMES, SYLPHS—

 

They seize each moment with zeal in order to dissolve the obstacles blocking their path to fulfillment. 

 

For them each moment is a magnetic sea containing the dreams and the taste of ecstasy--each moment arises from and resonates with the love sustaining all life on earth. 

 

They are able to transfer their astral bodies at will into a human woman or into a seal.

 

For them, anything in physical existence is constantly transforming, solidifying and dissolving again--in each moment matter and emptiness are flowing through each other like water being poured into water. 

 

These beings enter each moment seeking to attain and to abide in complete harmony.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE TRUE ABOUT THE GREAT WHITE BROTHERHOOD?

 

It is an offshoot of the Ku Klux Klan that promotes Aryan supremacy.

 

Is a male oriented secret society that gave rise to the Masons and the Rosicrucians. 

 

Is a group of white magicians who socialize together on the inner planes in extravagant virtual reality temples that they take turns creating through their power of visualization.

 

Recently changed its name to the Great White Personhood in order to be more politically correct.

 

There is no Great White Brotherhood.  Any mature magician is in direct contact with Divine Providence and has no need of joining a group in order to accomplish his work.

 

No, the Great White Brotherhood is the group of magicians who work directly with Divine Providence and are also know as Brothers of Light because they have penetrated into the sphere of the sun.

 

Due to a still classified altercation with the Illuminati, a number of the Ascended Masters composing the Great White Brotherhood have now moved on to better things. Therefore, the Great White Brotherhood is proud to announce it is now accepting applications from earth plane masters to fill these openings.  Think of it!  An officially certified Ascended Master ranking can now be yours.  Simply submit a one page essay on “Why I Should Be Called an Ascended Master” to any occult publishing company that publishes our works.

 

No, the Great White Brotherhood, whether real or not, is part of a conspiracy (probably invented by the Theosophists) to delude spiritual seekers into believing that there really is some masterful group of high initiates on the inner planes.  The purpose of setting forth this delusion is to seduce the innocent into giving their attention, time, but mainly money to those who claim to speak on behalf of the Great Delusion. 

   It does not matter in the least if there is or is not a Great White Brotherhood.  The point is that for just a little time and money you too can join with those (who no doubt are con men who believe their own con) who speak for and work with the GWB and share in this self-deception, group delusion, and neurological dysfunction—I mean, where is their brain during all of this?

 

Announcement: We at the Great White Brotherhood would like to say that we do not mind others making fun of us.  We love humor and a well written satire.  And furthermore we officially recognize that even blasphemy is one of the rights of free speech guaranteed in a democracy.

 

The Great White Brotherhood, whether real or not, may be construed as a “safety net” for spiritual practitioners.  In other words, if you should pursue the great enterprise of raising your consciousness through a rigorous magical and spiritual training system, the Great White Brotherhood will be there for you should you run into serious problems. 

     Neat, huh?  Should you fall off the high trapeze that circles the earth from the heights of akasha, down below are those who have ascended before you and who are ready to catch yah.  Well, don’t count it.  Come to think of it, I am noticing all this blood and guts, bone and broken skulls lying around down here on the circus floor. 

          (looking up at the trapeze)   

I wonder if perhaps those spiritual adventurers would have been a little more careful, perhaps practiced a little more diligently, if they had known that the floor where you end up if you fall is so hard?

 

No, we demons would like to put in a word here.  We would just like to say that we “sell protection” from accidents, you could call it spiritual insurance.  That’s right folks.  Keeping your feet on the ground is always advice most profound and we have found that by meeting your own needs first you will remain safe and sound. 

     So don’t go climbing ladders up to heaven when it might be best to lay away a few treasures first here on earth.  So many people think of us as the enemy.  No, No.  We are just friendly and our job description reads clearly: Wherein and wherefore the Great White Brotherhood may not be able to catch someone falling from a spiritual height (due to previous spiritual commitments), you are hereby commissioned to protect and uphold the journey of those who are heaven bound.  

     Understand now?  We are the keepers of the gates of reality.  And before you use one of those spiritual keys to escape, you will have to get past us, for we also have a deep respect for the law of gravity—for responsibility, limitation, karma, and restriction.  That’s right.  Before you ascend you have to first comprehend the purpose behind the “descent” that delivered you here.  To put it simply, before you can tight rope walk high among the clouds, you have to first learn to walk with your feet on the ground.

 

“Q” from the TV series, Star Trek, was introduced into the script through the influence of the Great White Brotherhood.  The Brothers wished to keep alive and revive a public image worthy of their celestial notoriety and so used dramatic conflict to portray their inner plane activity.  This is in the same way that Marvel Comics has kept alive mythology through its outlandish heroics and villainy.  In both cases, the goal is to prime the pump within the astral body so that the imaginations of the masses can still contemplate spirituality.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WOULD MAKE THE BEST THEME FOR AN OCCULT NOVEL:

 

You are an advanced magician who has attained immortality through your practice.  But to remain immortal you must avoid having love affairs with women.  You fall in love with a young girl, get her pregnant, lose your immortality, die by guillotine, and your daughter ends up being an orphan.

 

You become the high priest of Atlantis but with all the distractions and commotions you betray your true love and so end up whining and complaining through all your subsequent incarnations on earth about how guilty you feel.  (Dweller on Two Planets) You also later renounce your occult writing and become a Christian.

 

You decide on a lark to accomplish a magical incarnation by enticing a lunar spirit to incarnate as a human girl.  But you quickly lose interest in this incarnated spirit once she is born and move on to other things including your cocaine addiction.  (Moonchild by Crowley

 

Abandoned on a remote island by a relative who has stolen your political power and position, you attain justice in the end by utilizing the dark arts of magic.  Having restored the balance, you now renounce magic and get back to ordinary living. (Shakespeare’s The Tempest)

  

A magician gets trapped under a stone by his lover.  A king, due to pagan influences, mates with his sister to produce a son who later destroys his kingdom.  Your best friend and head of your armed forces has sex with your wife and then carries her off to his own kingdom.  But out of guilt she decides to become celibate and enters a monastery.  There is an additional side quest involving some sort of religious relic, a cup or something, that apparently possesses the same magical powers as a cauldron in Celtic mythology; but the king who holds this cup has been wounded in a part of his body that should not be mentioned in polite company. (The Death of Arthur)

 

Having acquired all wisdom of your age you remain doubtful of God’s existence.  So you sell your soul to the devil to find out if there is a God but later all is forgiven because your quest for the truth is sincere.  There is also a young girl who gets screwed in the process.  (Goethe’s Faust)

 

A vampire forces a writer to listen to his coming of age story.  (Interview with a Vampire by Ann Rice) You later renounce your occult writing and become a Christian and decide to write the young Christ’s coming of age story.

 

 

IN THE AUTHURIAN LEGENDS, KING ARTHUR’S LIFE DEPENDS ON THE ANSWER TO THE FOLLOWING RIDDLE—WHAT DO WOMEN DESIRE FROM MEN?  WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING SHOULD BE THE ANSWER:

 

Women desire that a man be sovereign over them.

 

No, not sovereign.  Women are happiest when men are in control and tell them what to do.  But then again when have women ever wanted just to be happy?

 

What women want most from men are money and the status that goes with it.  Some want children and a few want sex

 

Women want the man’s strength and power to join with their own to make a home.  And in that home they want love to flow without barriers or boundaries through body and soul.

 

Women are waiting for a lover who is wise, strong, and tender to discover their secrets, to taste their bliss, to ravish their hearts, and yet who will let them be as wild and free as the sea.

 

Women desire to give and receive love with a man in a way that makes the world new.

 

You think there is an answer?  Story: A guy finds a lamp on a beach and rubs it and a genie (usually a salamander) appears and offers him one wish.  The guy says “I hate flying and boats but I want to visit Hawaii.  Make me a bridge so I can drive.”   The genie replies, “Are you out of your mind?  Why the concrete alone would require more than is on earth not to mention the steel.  Give me another wish.”  “Ok,” says the guy.  “I have always wondered about women.  Tell me what women really want from men.”  And the genie replies, “Now was that two or four lanes you wanted for your bridge?” 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS MOSTLY LIKELY TO BE A REINCARNATED MAGICIAN:

 

Howard Stern, the reincarnation of the famous Chinese Poet Li Po as well as the great Zen Master, Duga, for his well-known contribution to radio talk shows by virtue of his tenacious, life long attempt to answer the Zen question, How does a man get through puberty?  (And how can you knock a guy who is getting paid two hundred million dollars by satellite radio to rant on like a broken record about sex and the curiosities of puberty?)

 

Bob Guglioni, the founder of Penthouse Magazine and the reincarnation of Sir Isaac Newton, for giving ten million dollars out of his own pocket in the 1970’s for the research of nuclear fusion, a non-toxic alternative form of energy. ($10 million in 1970 with appreciation and inflation is about $140 million today).

 

Hugh Heffner, the founder of Playboy Magazine and the reincarnation of both Virgil and Goethe, for being the first to racially integrate television in the U.S. as well as publishing the first writings of virtually every major American writer for thirty years.  Net worth—probably $205 million.

 

Bill Gates (the reincarnation of Sir Francis Drake and Genghis Khan), Using cut throat monopolistic practices, he has virtually stolen $900 billion from the rest of the world by forcing other nations to “outsource” computer operating systems to the U.S. for twenty years.  However, he has now founded the largest charity in the history of mankind worth $24 billion.  He uses this charity to raise the living standard of poor people around the world so they can afford to buy computers with his operating system.

 

Marilyn Monroe, for finally embodying what in her previous incarnation as the man Casanova (as well as the author, Ovid, during the Roman Empire) he/she sought to capture--the perfection of every man’s desire.  (Her net worth wasn’t that much.  Her value is more a cultural icon thing.)

 

Reminds me of the five wizards sent into Middle Earth from Valhalla.  Of the five, only one remained true to the mission.  The others got distracted or turned to the dark side.

 

No, the spiritual vision of Netzach is that of a beautiful, naked woman.  Every magician is required in his training to master the intricate complexities and the subtle nuances, the sensual tonalities and the full emotional spectrum of vibrations hidden within this vision.

 

 

IT IS NOT UNCOMMON FOR MAGICIANS TO HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT USING MAGIC TO WIN A LOTTERY.  THIS MONEY COULD BE USED FOR A GOOD PURPOSE.  YOUR BEST RESPONSE--

 

A magician, especially one having mastered the cosmic letter “k,” is able to take possession of any treasure on earth if it serves his spiritual purpose.  Kind of like George Washington requisitioning privately owned boats in order to cross the Delaware.  No one would accuse him of stealing.

 

No matter how sacred your purpose, you are not permitted any extravagances or short cuts, kind of like the instructions the head of Mossad gives his agents on secret missions—“I want a receipt for everything—and no prostitutes or no lap dances.”

 

Using magic to win a lottery is like stealing money from the poor to give to the poor—what kind of Robin Hood would do that?

 

States lotteries are “non profit” activities used to fund education and other public institutions.  Individuals spend money from their own pocket to buy tickets which offers them hope when their lives may have no hope.  And groups of investors buy tickets in large numbers balancing risk and return.  To use magic to gain a favorable outcome would be to undermine all these honest and legitimate efforts.  In other words, you generate a bad karma—you will have to pay back at some later date every cent that you take.

 

If you do win, the state gaming commission, the FBI, the CIA, the mafia, and other interested parties or outraged individuals will want “interviews” with you because they will find out.

 

There is no problem winning.  After all, magicians are superior to other people and everyone will understand that you are going to use this money for a noble purpose.  And although magic is intended to create wealth and not just take it out of one person’s pocket and put it into another person’s pocket as a lottery does, magicians are still superior to other people.  This is because part of a magicians training is in being a pickpocket as well as thieving in general. I mean who can steal thoughts, feelings, vitality, and dreams like a magician? 

 

Let’s review.  “Some of the worst things imaginable have been done with the best of intentions.” (Jurassic Part II)  What if demons are in charge of awarding the winning ticket in some lotteries.  Well then, you would be invading their turf, won’t you?  Kind of like wearing the wrong colors in the wrong part of LA. 

 

 

No for lotteries but yes for casinos.  Casinos, unlike lotteries, are “for profit” enterprises and someone is always trying to cheat them.  This cost or loss is figured into their daily operating expenses.  (See the movie Cooler for how casinos are fighting back to prevent magicians from cashing in the chips).

 

Actually the stock market is the traditional arena where criminals, honest investors, and reincarnated magicians fight to see who will win and who will lose.  (See David Swensen’s book, Unconventional Success.  Swensen, a reincarnated magician and recognized financial adept, has doubled the total endowment of Princeton University every four years for the last twenty years raking in tens of billions of dollars.  You could win all the lotteries on earth over a number of years and still not do what Swensen has done for “a good purpose.”)

 

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING NON-MAGICAL ACTIVITIES WOULD YOU ALSO CONSIDER FOR UNDERWRITING YOUR SPIRITUAL PURPOSES?  (I MEAN, WHY GO TO THE BOTHER OF DOING MAGIC WHEN SO MUCH MONEY IS AVAILABLE THROUGH NON-MAGICAL MEANS)

 

As church treasurer, you write out checks to yourself, cash them, and then paste your church’s name over your name on the checks.  Then you Xerox copies of these checks and place them in the church files so they look like normal church expenses.  ($1.2 million—treasurer of First Lutheran Church of Grosse Pointe who lives down the block from me)

 

Work with an appraiser, a buyer, and a seller to gain loans for more than homes are worth and then pocket the cash the bank pays the seller.   ($30 million—a Detroit mortgage broker, one of my high school classmates; $20 million in LA)

 

Persuade the head of a few trucking companies to accept kickbacks for issuing fake invoices for work never done in relocating a number of buildings in your city for urban renewal. ($8 million which he then blew in casinos—City Controller of Honolulu who lived down the block from me)

 

Gift stock and stock options to zoning commissioners, city management, local and state officials for an indoor gulf course while selling the stock to the public and transferring the balance to your off-shore accounts. ($65 million—Skyland Park Management Company, Naples, Fl. whose office was down the block from me)

 

Charge one per cent per year on the balance of accounts you invest for others until you manage $1 billion dollars and receive $10 million a year for your trouble.  (some successful financial advisors).

 

As an unlicensed financial advisor, issue false financial statements to your clients showing they are getting 20% return on their investments while you gamble away their money in day trading.  Meanwhile use new client’s money to make payments to older clients. When the judge asks you to explain, say “I thought that is what banks did—they take one clients money and give it to other clients.”  (Naples, Fl.)

 

Pray for money when you need it.  You may receive a check from your insurance company after your house burns down but, hey, you got the money, didn’t you?  (a man in Australia trying to pay for his trip to a spiritual seminar, who I met at the seminar).

 

Money is never a problem.  It always comes shortly after you pray for it.  And when it no longer comes?  Time to die.  (a Wiccan in the state of Washington)

 

Forget prayer. Set up an on-line pornographic pay for view website.  The world wide revenues for all such sites are currently $150 billion a year.  Shouldn’t part of this money be used for “the Lord’s work?”

 

There are countless ways of getting hold of individuals’ financial data to make withdraws from their checking accounts and charge their credit cards.  Think Internet. Why it will be at least another seven years before adequate security is in place to prevent this.  The window of opportunity is there.  Even without your participation, figure $300 billion will be taken from the innocent in the next seven years.  Shouldn’t some of this money “be going to the Lord’s work?”  Oh yes, by the way, consider travel packages to  nations with no extradition. 

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS NOT IN THE DEMONIC MANUAL OF HOW TO RUN A “CON,” THAT IS, SCAM PEOPLE OUT OF AND/OR DESTORY THEIR MONEY, FAITH, HOPE, LOVE, TRUST, INTELLIGENCE, AND WILL POWER?

 

One of the best cons is a Ponzie scheme—be as generous and reward as much as you can for small actions in the beginning until the mark becomes “hooked” before taking what you want from them.

 

The supreme con, beyond all other cons, is always accomplished by convincing yourself first beyond all doubt and with total sincerity that what you are doing is right and will be of the greatest benefit to others.  (To beat these guys you have to do a thorough background check and in-depth analysis of their purposed actions.  But that still won’t help if your weakness is deluding yourself).

 

The best method is the “soft sell”—you get others through their own incentive to freely “give you” whatever it is you want from them by virtue of your friendship, your sincerity, the way you trust them, and the deep emotional bond you have formed.

 

Your opportunities for fooling others will always be in direct proportion to your degree of intelligence, charm, and friendliness.

 

Intermittent rewards are the most effective for “hooking” others into doing what you want—you give small and large rewards but in an unpredictable manner so that others feels some efforts are immediately rewarded while other rewards come unexpectedly without any effort.  Never give rewards to others on a consistent basis because they will then believe you “owe it” to them or they will feel you are trying to manipulate them.

 

To test another person’s submission to your will all you need is one of the following: demand the person believe certain beliefs, feel specific feelings, or act as you act. 

 

Reveal to others their highest purpose in life but convince them in the process that because of the sacredness, holiness, or nobility of this purpose “the ends justify the means.”

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING BEST INCREASES YOUR CHANCES OF WORKING SUCCESSFULLY WITH SPIRITS OF THE EARTHZONE?

 

Ability to have a mind free of all thoughts for a half hour.

 

Having several elemental beings, nature spirits, who enjoy hanging out with you.

 

Being able to create several elemental beings (elementaries) who completely obey your will.

 

Having successfully evoked your Holy Guardian Angel.

 

Encountering the darkness in yourself.

 

Being able to “create” causes in the akasha for things that later manifest in the physical world.

 

Having a close relative who is a spirit of the earthzone along with good  references from several masters.

 

Finishing your eight year degree program in Bachelor of Magical Arts at the Magic University.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING BEST INDICATE THAT SOMETHING IS STARTING TO GO SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH YOUR MAGIC PRACTICE?

 

Your elementaries (magically created servants) begin swearing at you.

 

Demons enjoy hanging out with you.

 

You discover that you enjoy talking to ghosts more than to living people.

 

Women no longer enjoy having sex with you.

 

You miss your second mortgage payment after maxing out your three credit cards.

 

The spirits in your personal hierarchy start saying, “Don’t call us.  We’ll call you.”

 

While you are asleep and dreaming, an amateur magician in Poland evokes your astral body into his magic triangle thinking you are a spirit of the earthzone.

 

You begin to like the image of your worst self more than the image of your best when you look into your black and white magic mirrors of your soul.

 

 

FOLLOWING THE RULES OF EVOCATION, WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING SHOULD YOU NOT CHOOSE AS A SPIRIT FOR YOUR FIRST EVOCATION:

 

Nith-Haiah, the archangel of all magicians on earth.

 

Cigila, who maintains a spiritual web site listing every divine mission available on earth.

 

Ugolog, who will willingly reveal the past, present, and future of any human being, each person’s true spiritual  path, and all future incarnations up to final  perfection.

 

Cermiel, who presides over each individual soul during its existence between incarnations.  In other words, he knows the answer to the pseudo Zen question, What was my face before my father was born.

 

Anamil, who, using “electro magnetic volts” in the akasha, can guarantee a solution to any problem on earth.

 

 

NOTHING HAPPENS WHEN YOU PERFORM AN EVOCATION EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE USING A MAGIC WAND, CAP, BELT, INCENSE, ROBE, DAGGER, MIRROR, CIRCLE, AND TRIANGLE.  THE MOST LIKELY EXPLANATION IS

 

You let someone touch your magic wand.  Never let anyone touch your magic wand.

 

That book you bought on eBay, Quick and Easy Lessons for Clairvoyance and Telepathy, is not on the approved reading list for the Magicians Guild.

 

The spirit you evoked is actually standing in front of you inside your magic triangle.  You just can’t see or hear it.  Everything is ok.  Just don’t let the spirit know that you can not see or hear it.

 

It is always better to hire someone for $3,000 from the local occult book store to walk you through your first evocation.

 

If you can’t afford the $3,000, you can hire an experienced medium for $300 from your local occult book store who will “channel” a spirit.  In this way, you can get answers to your questions and “hear” what the spirit has to say to you.

 

If you can’t afford the $300, try working as a medium in your local occult book store until you have enough savings. 

 

You are not utilizing the resources available to you from the “Quick Answers for Magicians Having Difficulties” Phone Service that you can subscribe to on an annual basis for $243.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE TRUE ABOUT SPHERIC MAGIC?

 

The 72 spirits of the sphere of Mercury make up the absolutely secret, unpronounceable, and never to be written name of God (pronounced and written as Shem Ham Phorus) and these spirits know how to get things done.

 

The spirits of the sphere of Mars and Saturn may kill you on your first evocation unless you know those spheres’ secret passwords.

 

The spirits of the sphere of Uranus are the custodians of all magic in our solar system.

 

The spirits of the sphere of Pluto are not suitable for this phase of human evolution, that is, they don’t take calls.

 

The supreme spirit of this solar system is an embodiment of cosmic love which is fitting since our solar system is the heart chakra for a set of seven solar systems.

 

Evocation is not necessary for contacting spirits of the spheres.  You can simply engage them through “mental wandering.”

 

Contacting spirits through evocation or mental wandering is not necessary since any spirit’s quality or power can be mastered by working with the cosmic language of the Kabbalah.

 

 

THE BEST REASON FOR NEVER RECOMMENDING THE FRANZ BARDON BOOKS OF MAGIC TO ANYONE IS:

 

In a word—temptation.  For a reincarnated magician, a demon will make a courtesy call within two years offering “free gifts” in return for a little consideration.

 

These books accelerate your karma so that a student of them will encounter the worst in himself in the next five years instead of in the next fifty years.

 

The books reveal how to acquire divine power.  As such, the individual must first make an absolute commitment to the light before utilizing this power otherwise he will destroy part of his soul if any abuse occurs.

 

They are too difficult and so a waste of time for most people.

 

They have serious flaws, false information, and errors in them.

 

It costs one million dollars to train a B-1 bomber pilot.  It costs at two million dollars to pay for your living expenses for a life time while you attempt to master the exercises in these books.  Why you would have to win a lottery to get money like that.

 

Nonsense.  You are actually doing a good deed by sharing with others something you find helpful for yourself.

 

 

AFTER WORKING HARD AT STUDYING MAGIC FOR TWENTY YEARS, WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING JUSTIFIES ALL THAT WORK AND EFFORT:

 

You attain a brief experience with omnipresence in which you are aware of everything in the entire universe, including every speck of dust, among two hundred billion galaxies.

 

You get to hang out with the most beautiful creature on earth, the undine Istiphul, who initiates you into her mysteries of erotic love.

 

You get to hang out with numerous Venus spirits like Hagiel, Guru, Gomah, etc. who in the future will become the teachers of mankind in the areas of love, ecstasy, art, and intimacy.

 

You get to hang out with the higher spirits of the sun who reveal to you the original inspiration behind why the universe was created.

 

You learn through first hand experience the answers to you deepest questions about the mystery of life.

 

All that study allows you to work out your karma (to pay back to mankind the debts you owe) so that now you can finally put magic aside and get on with living a normal life.

 

Your magic allows you a brief interview with God in which He promises to give “serious consideration” to whatever petitions you make.

  

WHEN THE DALAI LAMA SAYS, “TAKE UP TO TWELVE YEARS TO SCRUTINIZE A MASTER BEFORE BECOMING HIS DISCIPLE,” HE MEANS:

 

He means what he says, namely, it takes twelve years of careful observation in which you may discover minor inconsistencies that will reveal the major underlying flaws in the master’s teaching, organization, or personality.

 

The Dalai Lama does not mean what he says.  What he really means is that you do not have to rush or feel pressured to become a discipline.  Just make sure you feel completely comfortable with a master before becoming his student.

 

He means what he says, namely, attend the master’s seminars.  Read all of the master’s books.  Interview a number of the master’s new and older students.  Compare this master’s approach to masters in similar and different traditions.  This may take you a few months or a number of years.  The idea is to make sure that the master you choose not only feels right but is right for you.

 

 

WHEN YOU ATTAIN PERFECT, COMPLETE, AND ABSOLUTE ENLIGHTENMENT YOU ….

 

Become omniscient.

 

You free yourself from suffering and the cycle of death and rebirth caused by false attachments so that you do not have to incarnate on earth again.

 

You are able to turn bad people into good people by your touch. (movie Golden Child).

 

People will build large, gold plated statutes of you for thousands of years. (see the history of Buddhism)

 

Your relics will radiate a light that will bring peace and prosperity to whichever kingdom possesses them. (movie Warriors of Heaven and Earth)

 

“You attain exactly nothing.” “There is no attainment and nothing to attain.” (Heart Sutra)

 

 

THE REASON WHY WESTERN MAGICIANS DO NOT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ENLIGHTENMENT IS

 

Because they do not live on the flight path of Buddhist masters traveling between the Orient and California.

 

Become Western magicians are more concerned with will power which is an aspect of the fire element than enlightenment which is an aspect of the air element.

 

Buddhism only makes sense within a feudal society.  That is, it requires a society with a rigid class structure, massive amounts of suffering due to overpopulation, and limited economic opportunity. Buddhist celibacy, monastic living, and detachment are among the best ways of getting your head clear under such circumstances.

 

Western magicians do not know anything about enlightenment because it never occurred to them. 

 

Because wearing light or dark orange or saffron robes, burning incense sticks, and sitting on a mat does not seem challenging enough for a Western magician.

 

Because for a Western magician having wisdom means you transform yourself through the act of transforming the world.  By comparison, for a Buddhist having wisdom means that you transform yourself first and then, and only then, will your mind be clear enough to think effectively about how to transform the world.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING INDICATES THAT YOUR “MASTER” IS CONSCIOUSLY OR NOT, DIRECTLY OR INADVERTENTLY, WILLINGLY OR UNWILLNGLY, WORKING FOR OR ON TEMPOARY LOAN TO THE DARK SIDE, THAT IS, TO THE DEMONIC ORDER? (I AM NOT MAKING THESE UP).

 

The master, though his number one disciple, tells you that you must sign over all your assets to his organization while you are studying with him in order to show good faith and demonstrate your commitment to the lineage.

 

The master tells you must take a vow never to reveal his teachings to anyone else including his other students because these teachings are meant only for you.  Later on you discover that he is teaching his other students the exact same things he is teaching you.

 

After taking the above vow and studying for ten years, the master tells you to assassinate another student who left the organization in order to “preserve the holiness of our lineage.” But don’t do it if this individual turns over all royalties, foreign, movie, and subsidiary rights as well as spin off royalties and a percentage of any future unrelated publications back to the organization after having written an unauthorized book about the sacred teachings.

 

Taking you to the side, the master casually confides in you that you should always charge your students as much as you can but not so much that you lose them because the more you charge the more seriously they will take your teachings.

 

The master tells you that in order to study further with him you must commit yourself to being his disciple for your next three incarnations.

 

Most run of the mill masters, prepackaged and prefabricated by overzealous and narrow minded traditions (or lineages), are actually not demonic or working with the dark side at all. They simply do not rise any higher in inspiration than abusive parents—who are incapable of acknowledging someone else’s thoughts and feelings and get angry as a defense when you try to express yourself.  And behind this little veil of inferiority they pretend they are superior. 

 

WHICH IS THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO PRESENT A CONSPIRACY THEORY?

 

It is not what you say or claim, but the way you can tap the fundamental fears, feelings of helplessness, frustration, etc. of your listeners.  For example, blame your conspiracy on some disadvantaged or suspicious social or ethnic group which you never liked anyway.

 

Present a theory which is coherent, systematic, and internally consistent but which has no means whatsoever of verifying through empirical observation.

 

If you must present evidence, use only one independent source.

 

Make sure your conspiracy is being discussed openly.  But leave numerous trails of disinformation containing false evidence that will cause the investigators of your theory to be publicly ridiculed and debunked so that your actual conspiracy can remain hidden.

 

Create “real” conspiracies by funding and promoting extremists groups whose actual threats and radical ideas. This will distract anyone with intelligence from discerning the deeper, far more malicious and devastating conspiracy you are planning.

 

Never ever link yourself in any way to a conspiracy.  Instead, inspire and feed information to young, naïve but highly motivated and talented individuals so that they imagine themselves creating the conspiracy.

 

There really are no conspiracies.  If there were, Copernicus, Newton, Einstein, Columbus, Martin Luther, Gandhi, the signers of the Declaration of Independence, etc. would have to be called conspirators.  Its all how you look at it. 

 

There is no best way to present a conspiracy theory.  When you feel helpless, vulnerable, or used, simply blame your feelings on an invisible organization that is in control, invulnerable, and abusive.  If you can’t find one under “the official list of old and new conspiracies” on Google, feel free to make one up.

 

If you get tired of hearing about conspiracies, simply convince yourself that you are the one behind the scenes controlling the fate of the world.

 

Those who believe in conspiracies lack imagination because they fail to understand both sides of a question.  Every conspiracy, even real ones, on some level has a valid interest and a useful purpose.  Lord of War is a brilliant movie because it allows the bad guy to fully articulate his motivation and purpose—e.g., the protagonist says more people are killed by alcohol and tobacco than by the sale of guns each year; and the U.S. sells more weapons to other nations in one day than he sells in a year; and he serves the U.S national interest by selling arms to countries which the U.S. can not officially support.

    A movie like Syriana is not so brilliant because it blindly labels international oil companies as being bad while failing to represent their legitimate functions.  And it stupidly assumes oil reserves are running out.  Canada alone has a hundred years of global oil supply that can be converted from sand and shale.  The international oil companies have to invest twenty years in advance to meet global demand.  And an oil company is not a welfare agency or FEMA or the Red Cross.  It is owned by its shareholders some of whom are firemen, cashiers, and bell hops.  And the Saudi Royal family is not simply inefficient and needs to become more efficient.  Most likely the entire ruling class needs to be removed before the country will invest in infrastructure and create jobs for those citizens who are not politically connected. 

   You don’t have a compelling movie until the bad guy states the real reasons why what he does is the best thing for everyone (at least in his own mind).  The same with a conspiracy—you have to get inside the mind of the conspirators and allow them to articulate with great intelligence why their actions are invaluable.  (And of course, once you truly understand the minds of the conspirators you are officially authorized by akasha to modify that conspiracy according to your own secret purposes.)

      UFOs are taking possession of the minds of human beings?  Well then human beings can take possession of the minds of UFOs.  No one gets a free pass when it comes to world domination.  There is always someone in the wings ready to steal the movement and drive it in a new direction.  And this person could be you.

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING INDIVIDUALS USED MAGIC IN THE BEST WAY TO ACCOMPLISH HIS PURPOSE?

 

Moses who called the Angel of Death to kill the first born male of every Egyptian in order to persuade the Pharaoh to “let my people go.”

 

The prophet Isaiah for calling the Angel of Death to wipe out two thirds of the Assyrian army besieging Jerusalem?

 

Pope Leo, when he left Rome and walked out all by himself, to persuade Attila the Hun to take his massive army and turn around and go back home?

 

The King, during the Norman Invasion, for paying a Catholic Priest to perform a mass to change the wind direction so his ships could sail from France to England in order to invade in a timely manner?

 

St. Patrick for banishing all the snakes from Ireland?

 

General Patton, for ordering his personal chaplain to write a prayer which Patton read aloud to get the clouds to clear so his planes could bomb the Germans during the Battle of the Bulge?

 

St. Germaine who “manifested” during the Continental Congress to inspire the delegates to stop bickering and finish writing the constitution?

 

 

JOSEPH CAMPBELL SAYS THAT ALL SPIRITUAL QUESTS ARE THE SAME STORY TOLD IN TEN THOUSAND DIFFERENT WAYS:  A HERO IS CALLED, TRICKED, OR FORCED BY NECESSITY INTO CROSSING THE BARRIERS SEPARATING THE KNOWN AND UNKNOWN WORLDS.  UPON ENTERING THE UNKNOWN, HE ACQUIRES MYSTERIOUS COMPANIONS WHO HELP HIM OVERCOME DIFFICULTIES UNTIL HE HAS ONE SUPREME ENCOUNTER.  WINNING THIS ENCOUNTER, HE ACQUIRES VARIOUS TREASURES THAT HE BRINGS BACK TO ENRICH HIS SOCIETY.  WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING DO NOT QUALIFY USING THIS FORMULA?

 

You go around persecuting and destroying Jews who became Christians.  But after a one time vision on the road to Damascus you decide it is better to support the Christians and so you now go around destroying the faith of Jews in the law.  (Apostle Paul)

 

It is prophesized at your birth that you will become a king, a great law giver who will bring universal prosperity to your world, or else a great world teacher.  Your father, the king, decides he wants you to follow in his steps so he prevents you from ever seeing suffering.  You discover suffering in the world and, pissed off at your father’s ploy, decide to strike out on your own and solve this problem once and for all.  (Buddha)

 

God tells you to tell the Assyrians that they are doomed. You choose to ignore God but He sweetens the deal by making you an offer you can’t refuse.  You tell the Assyrians they are doomed but get pissed at God because he backs out of his promise to destroy them.  (Jonah)

 

Pissed off at your master with all the pussy footing around with spiritual exercises, you demand that your master give you shaktipat (a transmission of spiritual awareness from the master directly to you).  Your master refuses and so in order to convince him of your sincerity you tie a huge rock to your leg and threaten to throw it into the river unless he relents.  He gives in to your request.  (Swami Rama)

 

On your spiritual quest, you can’t help thinking about sex.  You even start imagining that beautiful women have come to seduce you only to discover that they turn into horrible serpents after you embrace them.  But by chance you come upon an out of print book in a lonely cottage that explains everything: behind beautiful women the Goddess Kundalini is waiting to initiate you.  (Swami Muktananda)

 

A second angel appears to you at age six wearing wings, a choir robe, etc.  He says you are called to enter “the service.”  Getting pissed off you say, “Get lost. I did not incarnate in the twentieth century in order to return to the Piscean age’s blind devotion and religious idiocy.”  But the angel, diabolically clever, immediately causes a girl to be born whom you will later meet in life and who entices you through her beauty and vulnerability into studying magic. (W.M.)

 

You are an electrical engineer who has just successfully designed the nose cone for a missile produced by Hughe’s Aircraft.  In a chance meeting, a hereditary witch asks you to study magic with her.  You do not believe in magic until she shows up in your office with a candle and tells you to point your finger at the flame and make it bend in different directions.  You give it a try and discover you can bend the candle flame at will.  You quit your job and open an occult bookstore with her later discovering that you can also cause lightning to strike by pointing your finger.  (Bob M.)

 

Consider: Although magic has a vital part to play in every age, for the public and for society at large magic is in fact irrelevant to our world.  Which of the following best support the above statement.

 

Internet, which is applied technology and not magic, is a direct gift to mankind from the spirits of Uranus, the guardians of all magic.  Internet, far more than any magic practice, empowers individuals to transform themselves and the world around them.

 

You can spend a lifetime dedicated to studying magic.  In doing so, you may benefit a few other individuals, maybe a few thousand with whom you have direct contact.  But if you help develop one new medicine, one new genetic formula, one new breakthrough in any branch of science, you will benefit tens of millions of people around the world.  Going purely by the numbers, magic is not the best investment of your time and energy.

 

People think that magic speeds things up (the getting something for nothing approach) but it actually is a way of slowing things down so you do things right the first time around.  If people realized that studying genuine magic is more expensive in time and energy, in emotion and commitment than any other discipline you will lose ninety-nine per cent of your practitioners.

 

Though the foundations of modern chemistry arose from the experiments of alchemists in the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries, since then magic has made no appreciable contribution to culture, law, politics, religion, science, literature, or art. Harry Potter and The Lord of the Rings are contributions from fantasy and mythology, not magic. 

 

In the scientific method, you perform an experiment that is reproducible by other individuals.  It is subject to observation and verification though quantifying variables.  All of this takes place within the context of a recognized and accepted body of knowledge and a set of theories that are consistent with an overall paradigm.  Magic offers no such method, no such quantifiable or reproducible results, and in no way is part of any generally accepted and recognizable paradigm of accumulated knowledge.  

  

IF THERE IS A HEAVEN, WHEN YOU DIE WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE GOD TO SAY TO YOU WHEN HE MEETS YOU AT THE PEARLY GATES?

 

Well done.  Now for your next assignment on earth.

 

Well done.  Now you do not need to ever again incarnate on earth.

 

You take yourself too seriously.  Come on in.   I have a couple of hookers and a high ball waiting for you. (Sean Penn)

 

Yes, Elvis, James Dean, Marilyn Monroe, and Hemingway—they are all here but no, come to think of it, I haven’t seen any televangelists around.

 

I have been waiting for you.  Could you watch the pearly gates for a while?  I need to get a few things done.

 

Welcome.  Here is the short list of things you can do with yourself for the rest of eternity.

 

“Just to know that there is laughter.  Like God saying, ‘There are these two Jews who walk into a bar ….’” (Robin Williams)

 

 

You practiced and mastered magic in a previous life time.  Consequently, before you are born you are given the choice of a spiritual gift to insure that you fulfill a divine mission of your own choosing on earth.  Which one from the following “gifts” would you choose?

 

Your concentration will develop to such an extent that you can command the attention of any spirit to answer your questions at least for a period of five minutes including any of the archangels.

 

Your magical equilibrium, that is, your emotional intelligence—the balance between the elements in your astral body—is so developed that you are able to avoid any emotional entanglements or confusion during the entirety of your life.  This means you have the aura of a saint.

 

Choose one of the following three:

Your clairvoyance is such that you can easily read the future of any person you meet.

Your telepathy is such that you can understand the thoughts of any being, mortal or divine.

Your clairfeeling is such that you can feel what is in the heart of any being and also materialize any spirit at least to some degree on the physical plane.

 

Although possessing no magical abilities, your innate business skill will allow you by age thirty five to be worth fifteen billion dollars.  Utilizing this wealth, you create endowments for five magical universities.  This will guarantee that for the next five hundred years there will be an ample supply of highly trained magicians on earth who will serve the purposes of Divine Providence.

 

 

The difference between the positive and the negative in magic, that is, between serving the light and serving darkness, serving Divine Providence and working  for demons is ….choose the best answer:

 

Is the difference between being constructive and being destructive.

 

There is no difference between the positive and negative in magic.  They both serve the same purposes as in “the demons are but angels in disguise teaching us how to let go of all of our attachments.”

 

The difference between good magicians and the black path is that the black magicians have no sense of wonder, awe, or gratitude for being alive.

 

Good magicians should always fight black magicians and insure that their purposes fail.

 

Good magicians should not interfere with black magicians because everything serves a purpose.

 

 

An Angel appears to you at age five.  I know, I know, age five is before the age of maturity and consent and responsibility.  But guess what?  Angels apparently are too stupid to know that because this happened the way I am telling it. And the angel tells you to make a wish (as a token of recognition for your spiritual accomplishments in past lives).

 

Do you ask for love since love is missing in one form or another from the lives of everyone around you?

 

Do you ask for wisdom so that you might understand how to help those around you?

 

Do you ask for power so that you might accomplish your work in life?

 

Do you ask for money since you notice that poverty prevents everyone you know from being loving, understanding, getting a good education, and being able to contribute to society?

 

Do you ask for real excitement since the church your parents are dragging you to three times a week is so incredibly, incomprehensibly boring?

 

Do you ask to be “big” so that you can beat up the bullies down the block?

 

 

A demon appears to you and says, If you hurt another person every so often in just the right way, then you will be free of pain, doubt, depression, and you will succeed.  In fact, he argues, this is the only you will ever be able to live life to the fullest.  And further, he insists, all men of power, leaders, and political, social, and religious reformers as well as women of beauty know and practice this method of human engagement.  Choose the best response of the following:

 

Do you say to him, I live under the dictum, Do no harm.  I would never think of hurting another person and so you turn him down.

 

Do you say to him, I live under the dictum, Do no harm, but then again, there is no gain without pain and, in fact, being able to share pain with others has always the test of friendship, genuine love, and a closely knit community and so you accept his offer.

 

Do you say, I live under the dictum, Do no harm, but a man has to take care of himself and his family otherwise you are not a man and so you accept his offer.

 

Do you say, I live under the dictum, Do no harm, but I also am an initiate and practitioner of the wrathful side of compassion—you can’t help other people without pushing them on occasion beyond their self-imposed limitations.  And anyway, all demons as well as positive spirits are always willing to serve the purposes of a true magician.  And so you say to the demon, you are not telling me anything I don’t already know.

 

Do you say to him, I understand your offer but what would be involved if my counterproposal consists of only practicing your method when I am in dire circumstances?

 

Do you say to the demon, Pain and limitation have always been my best teachers.  I have no need of your offer and so you send him away.

 

Never respond to a demon.  This is not about hurting other people.  And it is not a discussion about morality, ethics, spirituality, cost-benefit analysis, right and wrong, or good and bad.  The entire purpose of the demon is to get you to commit acts, whether small or great, that lead to the destruction of your conscience.  Next to this loss, everything else is irrelevant.

 

THE ACTRESSES MICHELLE PFEIFFER AND MONICA BELLUCCI

 

Are proof of the existence of God.* (See also note at end)

 

Demonstrate that beauty contains a magical power to bring together all the diverse aspects of yourself (known and unknown) so that you experience wholeness.

 

Are further proof of the theory of intelligent design over evolution and natural selection.

 

Are waiting for a modern writer, who in one glance as with Dante at Beatrice, will bring forth a new vision of the union of heaven and earth proclaiming that God is still sovereign and in charge.

 

Their cinematic appeal and stardom arises from a subtle interweaving of pagan and Christian influences.

 

By concentrating on their beauty, they can be used as a yidum or magical image that will take your consciousness into akasha, a state of awareness penetrating space and time.

 

Create desires that are more suitable for discussion in a bar than in an academic setting.  (“What a wicked thing you do to make me dream of you.”) 

 

At least there are these two women who do not hate men.  Don’t give up guys.  There have got to be a few more out there. 

 

*(Note: Michael Douglas emailed me to say that for him Catherine Zeta-Jones offers proof each night as he holds her tight; Tom Hanks also insists that “the warm bed I share with his wife” is direct evidence; Roger Ebert, the well-known movie critic, wishes that we might see as he that Ashley Judd is love personified; Hugh Heffner called me to say that when Marilyn Monroe signed up to display in his first Playboy Magazine that it was no less than a sign from God anointing him to fulfill a divine mission; and who would deny that Meryl Streep is an angel in disguise or perhaps one of the seven sisters from the Pleiades who has come down from heaven?)

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE TRUE:

 

Contentment is the greatest wealth on earth. (Swami Rama)

 

A woman who loves you with all of her heart is the greatest wealth on earth. (the lunar spirit Ebvap)

 

Happiness is inevitable. (King Uddeshtira, from Mahabarata)

 

Everything good in life will come to you in its own time and in its own way. (Susan Penfield)

 

We are adrift in a sea of motionless time until we come to realize there are worlds enough for becoming ourselves. (Frank Waters)

 

All the great battles of life are first fought within your own heart. (Krishna)

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE ESSENTIAL FOR A MAGICIAN:

 

A judicial temperament: an impartial ability to withhold judgment, to consider case and precedent, and to make decisions after carefully weighing the evidence on both sides of an argument.

 

The ability to argue both sides of a question because you can understand equally well the feelings and thoughts of everyone involved.

 

A tolerance for ambiguity: you can look at situations from different perspectives without feeling compelled to adopt one view or another.  It also does not bother you that sometimes you have to make decisions based on incomplete information.

 

Being practical and down to earth, that is, having a fully operational bullshit detector.

 

A sense of humor.

 

Just place your right hand on the book, IIH, and repeat after me: “I have superhuman patience; I am beyond all fear; my will is perfect, complete, and absolute; my dedication is pure; my determination will persevere until I attain perfection.” There, that should take care of any missing pieces when you present your resume to akasha though technically speaking you may want to throw in, “I embody personal, universal, and cosmic love, all-embracing, omnipresent, everywhere and in everything.”

 

“I love touching dark edges.  I love going to dark places.” (Domino Harvey)  What can I say?  In my screenplay a character says, “In my heart, light and darkness join.” Or maybe we could hear from Lao Tzu: “One who preferring light, prefers darkness also is an image of the world.” But Domino said it in a more feminine way without the masculine craving for a happy ending.

 

 

 

POP QUIZ FOR MAGICIANS PART II

 

IN THAT GREAT EARLY SCIENCE FICTION MOVIE, FORBIDDEN PLANET, EARTHMEN STUMBLE UPON AN ADVANCED CIVILIZATION THAT HAS UTTERLY DESTROYED ITSELF.  THIS WAS DUE TO “MONSTERS OF THE ID.”  WHAT ARE THESE MONSTERS?

 

Id as in Freudian psychology—the chaotic, conflicting drives of the unconscious.  I guess these aliens didn’t know their Freudian psychology.

 

They had no Great White Brotherhood to protect them. Isn’t that obvious?

 

Monsters of the Id refers to primordial instincts present during early phases of evolution. The race destroyed itself because it had no Steven Spielberg to make movies like Jurassic Park about life forms such as dinosaurs that possess a lethal combination of intelligence and determination.

 

Perhaps there is an intelligent race in about every hundred cubic light years in our galaxy.  Roughly five per cent of these races end up destroying themselves.  This might be due to any one of the following running rampant: nanotechnology, an AI, a level five air born virus, an asteroid, weapons of  mass destruction, or just an old fashioned nuclear experiment like the one a few years back on the East Coast in which scientists speculated about a “miniscule” chance of destroying the earth.  Kind of like what was rumored to have happened to the planet that used to fly between Mars and Jupiter—now the asteroid belt.

 

No, one of their world teachers declined to sacrifice himself for the greater good.  As a result, the entire race had to be destroyed to “restore the balance.”

 

They forgot that whenever you move on to a new magical practice you have to restore the balance in your astral equilibrium which is automatically thrown out of whack. 

 

They relied on machines to materialize and dematerialize.  Never rely on machines for your materializing and dematerializing needs.

 

Like the creatures in the book/movie Space Vampires, they forgot that “survival is always an issue” until a race attains final and complete enlightenment.

 

They had no magician’s guild.  Approximately 80 per cent of all races in our galaxy have no indigenous magician’s guild.  The magicians guild’s number one job is looking out for the future.  (If you are an alien on earth and reading this message you can apply for a guild on your home planet [for a small fee; barter is ok] by hiring The Magician’s Guild’s We Are Here for You Out There Quick Response Team.)

 

The did not know the saying, “The higher you go into the light the deeper your roots sink down into the darkness.” The roots of their unconscious sank down until it awoke the “Monsters of the Id” buried within them.  This contamination of their conscious selves resulted in their transformation into blind fanatics who immediately killed each other off fighting over whose beliefs were right.

 

 

IN ONE OF STEVEN SIEGAL’S MOVIES, THE BAD GUY SAYS, “ASSUMPTIONS ARE THE MOTHER OF ALL FUCKUPS.”  WHICH ASSUMPTIONS MIGHT MOIST LIKELY LEAD TO PROBLEMS IN A STUDENT’S PRACTICE?

 

You assume if you follow the exercises the way the master says then everything will work out ok.

 

You assume that if you do not follow the exercises the way the master says then everything still will work out ok.

 

When Bardon says you will need “superhuman patience” you ask yourself, “Doesn’t everyone have superhuman patience?”

 

You say to yourself, “Somewhere between the first and second chapters I’ll just sneak in a little astral travel, clairvoyance, and spirit evocation.”

 

You say the obvious, “I am already a sixteenth level initiate in another magic system.  In fact, I am an initiate of the sphere of Chesed. Take that Bardon.”

 

You say to yourself, “I live a simple, honest life free of distractions.  I am sincere and dedicated.  What more does a guy need?”

 

 

THE BEST WAY FOR A MAGICAN TO GET RID OF DEPRESSION IS

 

Hang out with Gnomes.  Gnomes can take you to a place within silence where depression is afraid to go.

 

Male magicians tend to become overly mental, abstract, detached, and obsessed with will.  This can be corrected if they spend time with the opposite of themselves—young women whose emotions are bubbly like champagne, blindly accepting, and naturally affectionate due to the high levels of estrogen in their bloodstreams.

 

Depression is a refusal to acknowledge the greatest secret of life: “You are on the highest path when you are attracted to the thing that is most unlike yourself and which you consider to be inferior.” (the Supreme Spirit of the Solar System).  Take a moment and consider exactly what that is in case you ever want to add a little spice to your life.

 

The most basic principle in psychology is “if what you are doing is not working try doing something different.”  Try doing something different.

 

Depression is anger turned within.  Anger arises from failing to exercise your will.  If you want to get over your depression, decide on a decisive course of action guided by all the feelings in your heart and all the wisdom your mind can provide.  In other words, always have a backup plan of action in case your current course of action leaves you high and dry.

 

No to all of the above.  Depression is the result of sensory deprivation.  Go on a shopping spree, eat some chocolate, get a lap dance, a good football game, a party, a good movie, express yourself in art or through intimacy—you got the idea?

 

 

IN THE BOOK, THE LAST UNICORN BY PETER BEAGLE, THE MASTER IS UNABLE TO TEACH MAGIC TO ONE OF HIS STUDENTS.  SO THE MASTER GRANTS THE STUDENT IMMORALITY SO THAT THE STUDENT CAN LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO DISCOVER MAGIC ON HIS OWN.  WHAT IS THE MOST LIKELY REASON THE STUDENT COULD NOT LEARN MAGIC?

 

No, the reason he granted him immortality was that the student’s dumb questions were driving the master crazy.  By granting him immortality the master could finally get some peace and quiet.

 

The master rightly understood the saying, “The wise do not know all ends.” (Gandolf)  Therefore the master granted immortality to his student because he recognized that life is a greater teacher of magic than any magician or wisdom tradition.

 

It is a system of self-initiation.  The only way anyone ever learns anything is by discovering it for themselves.

 

No, the student knew the master would lose face if he failed in trying to teach someone magic.  So the student played dumb in order to force the master to grant him immortality.

 

The problem with immorality is that you permanently impregnate your body and soul with youthful energy.  Even if you possess wisdom your youthful energy denies you the ability to apply that wisdom.  All students of magic are eventually given the choice between being wise or acquiring immortality.  If the student had chosen wisdom he knew he would have started growing old.  (Thus the saying, “A wise man does not wish to be young again” is actually a statement of fact: you can’t have both wisdom and youth in the same soul.  This is a joke, right?)

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MIGHT BE SPOKEN BY A SPIRIT OF THE SPHERE OF VENUS? 

 

“Love is the only experience in which you can let go of yourself without knowing anymore who you are or what you are becoming.”

 

“Each moment contains an abyss.  Only the heart can chart a path across.”

 

“Love gratifies your deepest cravings and reveals your highest path to perfection.”

 

“Love is bliss unafraid of emptiness.  It is desire unafraid of loss.  It is a yearning burning so hot it annihilates the shadows within the lover’s heart.”

 

“If you could take all of nature and extract from it its beauty and then drink this elixir and attain immortality you would still not taste the bliss I taste when I hold my Beloved in my arms.”

 

“Who is like my Beloved? At her touch, the sun and moon dissolve into a brighter light.  Day and night join as one.  The life animating plant, animal, and tree, human and Divine being return to their source at the center of my heart.”

 

“When I meditate I am embraced by countless beings of love and might who guide and guard all paths of wisdom and all evolutions: with both mortal and divine I join my heart and mind to celebrate the Light embracing all of creation.”

 

 

WHICH IS TRUE ABOUT THE UNIVERSE?  IT WAS CREATED

 

Though an act of love. (Franz Bardon)

 

The universe is a mistake. (Steven Hawkin)

 

“The universe will not end until every heart is found and every soul becomes pure light.” (paraphrase of the Dalai Lama’s vow)

 

“God’s will will not be fulfilled until there are hearts big enough to contain the entire universe within themselves.” (Seventh of the Seven Lords of Creation).

 

God got it wrong the first time.  We are now living in a universe that is His second try.  (Jewish legend)

 

The universe arose from the dream of the gods who then became entangled in the web of their own creation. (Hindu Vedas)

 

The universe demonstrates an intelligence behind its design.  Now was that intelligence “an unmoved mover” (Aristotle), perhaps a large cabbage plant (Hume), a turtle (I-Ching), an impersonal God (Benjamin Franklin), a bunch of mean old Titans (Greek mythology), etc.?  Where do you weigh in on this?

 

 

IN THE BOOK, WIZARD OF EARTHSEA BY URSULA LEQUIN, THE YOUNG WIZARD GED EVOKES A SPIRIT THAT HAS NO NAME.  WHY IS A SPIRIT THAT HAS NO NAME A PROBLEM?

 

“Where word breaks off no thing may be.” (Trakl) See Martin Heidegger’s essay On Poetry.  There is no problem because something can not exist within our world if you fail to record it in your magical journal.  If you don’t write about your mystical or magical experiences they lost forever.

 

Nothing can exist unless it has a name. (Franz Bardon)

 

It has no name because its nature is shaped by colors of light vibrating in spectrums that do not exist in our solar system and so it is not subject to the Kabbalah or cosmic language as we know it.

 

If you do not have the magical name for any being (which is what was meant in “having no name”) then you can not control that being.  No name means out of control.

 

The Old Testament and the Kabbalah were written by Jewish mystics who were very good at scrabble and cross word puzzles.  They hid a lot of prophecies about the future in religious texts by hiding words within words.  If something is not in the Official Jewish Mystic Scrabble and Crossword Players Dictionary then it can not exist and can safely be ignored because it is just fiction.

 

 

THE REASON MAGICIANS DO NOT MAKE GOOD FRIENDS IS

 

Friendship is not one of the things they need for attaining magical equilibrium.

 

Their divine missions make them too busy for friends.

 

Instead of taking calls on their cell phones at a restaurant, they take “calls” from spirits.

 

If they ever should think bad thoughts about you, you end up with a headache or else the bad thoughts rattling around inside your head.

 

If an evocation goes bad for them, they may suddenly look ten years older, check into a mental hospital, or convert to fundamentalist Christianity or the Hari Krishnas.

 

They may think it is funny to slip a tiny firedrake inside your aura when you aren’t looking.

 

If you speak the name of the devil in their presence, the devil appears.

 

When you ask them for some magic that gets you money, love, or a job they fail to warn you in advance about the disastrous side effects that come with fulfilling your wish.

 

No, the reason male magicians do not bond well with other men is that, like most men, they are still working on the problem of how to please women.

 

Without even thinking or giving it a second thought (because it only takes a few seconds), they may try to hypnotize you or use your aura as a medium for evoking a spirit.

 

The simple fact is that a genuine and mature magician operates from a place beyond the knowledge of our world.  Whether he knows it or not, his own mind and heart are illuminated with a light reason can not conceive and intuition can not perceive.  And though he may try to be consistent and friendly, his essence is formless beyond word, image, thought, or feeling.

 

         

THE BEST FORM OF PSYCHIC DEFENSE IS

 

When attacked, try drawing pentagrams in the air pronouncing the sacred and holy names of God, the guardians, and the archangels of the four quarters.  This will cause any evil spirit to immediately collapse from laughter or else think it has wandered into the Comedy Store in Hollywood.

 

Stop it!  You are confusing the innocent.  The Official Guide to Franz Bardon’s Practices clearly states and I quote, page 45, “In order to draw pentagrams successfully in the air you must 1. Imagine that the hand that is drawing them is actually the hand of some divine being such as God; 2.  You must draw the pentagram on all three planes simultaneously—the mental, astral, and physical; and 3.  The pentagram must act as a summary of all of your experiences with the four elements and their integration in the akasha.  The pentagram in itself has no magical power just as a cross has no magical power unless a Christian is holding it and understands its symbolism.  In other words, you only get out of magic what you put into it.”  (Then again, what about in the movie The Mummy in which the thief holds up a Star of David and speaks in Hebrew and the Mummy says, “The language of the slaves.”  You never know.  Maybe a pentagram will make the spirit stop and think of some other reason for not bothering you.)

 

Try running a copper wire around your bed and, when your wife is not around, attach it to a dagger you stab into the beautiful varnished wooden floor beneath your bed.

 

Put your hand into a bucket of water to drain away any negativity.

 

Place little mirrors surrounded by the eight trigrams of the I-Ching above some of the windows in your house.

 

Magically charge each day a psychic “Do Not Disturb” sign you hang in the air outside your house.  That is, visualize a sphere of white light on the ground around your house and with a commanding voice full of absolute conviction say or project into the circle, “The circle represents the harmony and law of the universe.  Nothing may cross that is not in accord with that harmony.”

 

Like Crowley, project your mind inside the negative spirit or entity until that being falls over dead from the vibration of cocaine you have flowing through your blood stream.

 

Repeat the Buddhist mantra, “There is no attacker, attack, or anyone being attacked.” (Or, alternately, read aloud the Heart Sutra or, if you are Jewish or Christian, Psalm 90)  That is, make your mind empty, nothing, and joined to the Great Void (akasha, the unmanifest, sunyata, whatever) until the attacking energy or entity can do nothing else than turn around and attack whoever sent it in the first place.

 

Stand in the center of your magic circle joining yourself to God.  Any being, positive or negative, will then be force to serve your will.

 

Better yet, simply threaten to stab any negative being or energy with your magic dagger or trident.

 

And even better yet, hire whoever is attacking you to defend you against some other real or imagined enemy.  The bad guys will be so honored to be recognized in this way they will now consider you a friend.

 

With a loud, authoritative, and persuasive voice, explain to the negative entity that it is just so unfair the way its master has enslaved and abused it in the past.  Then with a commanding voice send it back to attack whoever sent it.  (Max Freedom Long)

 

Practice entering a timeless and spaceless state of awareness by imagining a dark, ultraviolet light emanating from every pour of your body and going throughout the universe.  Then identity with every particle of light you have emitted (that is, make yourself in a vast empty void).  Then when you need to, simply “zap” any negative being when it comes around with this dark, ultraviolet light and akasha which you send from your hands into this being destroying any attachment to form it may possess.

 

 

THE REASON MAGICAINS ARE SUPERIOR TO OTHER PEOPLE IS

 

Magicians are only superior because they train more than others and work through their karma fairly quickly.

 

There are no real masters and no one is superior to anyone else.  Masters are just specialists who know a lot about a few things and are just as stupid as anyone else in other areas.

 

Magicians are superior to other people because they have a full catalogue of talismans, sigils, and charms that they receive when they join the Magician’s Guild. 

 

Magicians are not only superior.  As they develop they bring their microcosm into harmony with the greater macrocosm until they have mastered the elemental realms, the earthzone, and magic of the spheres as well as the cosmic language of the Kabbalah.  They then become a virtual god incarnate free of any karma and now acting as direct representatives of Divine Providence.  (Did I miss anything? Oh yah, at this point they are finally able to wrap up any exercises they failed to master in Initiation into Hermetics)

 

No real magician would ever say he is superior (even if he was).  This is because the more mature a magician is the greater his humility and desire to serve.

 

Most people operate in the three dimensions of the physical, astral, and mental planes.  A magician adds a fourth dimension—akasha--that penetrates through space and time.  Whereas most people are struggling to master physical necessities, emotional needs, and mental clarity, a magician is struggling to master omnipotence, omniscience,  and cosmic wisdom.  Though this does not make the magician a better person, it does give him or her a fantastic flexibility.  (See the book, Troubleshooting, Safety Tips, and Repair Manuel for 4th Dimensional Travelers.  Also see the New Age book, Your OK, He’s OK, but I am Superior).

 

Let’s be practical.  The magician opens the gates to the inner planes by casting his magic circle consecrating it with water.  He draws pentagrams and sigils on the circumference like an artist whose paintbrush leaves a trail of fire.  His eyes sparkle with divine authority.  His voice resonates with a sacred ferocity as he chants great and mighty words of power.  Standing at the center of the circle, he joins himself with God so that what he wills might be fulfilled, that no obstacle can long resist what he commands to manifest. 

     Now if that is not superior I don’t know what is.

 

No.  Magicians are not superior.  They just have big egos—it a professional hazard.  When they work with the elemental beings, these beings are profoundly grateful to serve the will of a magician who is joined to akasha.  And so naturally when a magician is so respected and honored and treated as a master on the inner planes, he expects other people to treat him the same way.  And this is why magicians are not very social.  No one can stand being around them.

 

 

MARILYN MONROE DIED BECAUSE SHE DID NOT KNOW THE ANSWER TO THE RIDDLE—WHAT DO MEN WANT FROM WOMEN?  WHICH ANSWER SHOULD SHE HAVE KNOWN IN ORDER TO HAVE AVOIDED BEING MURDERED?

 

Men want women to accept the man’s sovereignty over them.

 

Men love war more than women, food, or sleep.  (an ancient Greek proverb)

 

The only reason a man is interested in a woman is to have sex or children.

 

Men want the beauty of women in their lives.  They want the oneness sex implies.  They want the tender love they see in children’s eyes.

    

Men (whether they know it or not) want a world in which women are fully aroused.  This is the only way they can see the inner light shining in all things.  Without this, they fail to attain their destiny.

 

“To understand a woman in love you first imagine a man and then you take away his reason.” (As Good as It Gets)  It is not that men want women to be more rational; they just want them to be more agreeable.

 

Men all want the same thing from women.  Some are just more patient than others.  (Jennifer)

 

No, no, no.  This is not a gender issue. Marilyn fell victim to the Kennedy Curse that killed John and Bobby.  Actually the death of one woman was not enough save Ted Kennedy.  It also required the selfless sacrifice of Marilyn to break the curse and of course Teddy has to settle for being a U.S. senator instead of president.

 

Yes it is a gender issue.  Whether you are a president, an attorney general, or a kid named Elton John or Howard Stern finding a magazine under a bed, it makes no difference.  You want “desire and need joined to intimacy so that loneliness and separation are shattered and broken asunder and replaced with kindness, friendship, and love.” (from Istiphul)

 

Don’t you think we should consider God’s point of view on this topic? “Do you know what the human body goes through when you have sex?  Pupils dilate, arteries constrict, core temperature rises, heart races, blood pressure skyrockets, respiration becomes rapid and shallow, the brain fires bursts of electrical impulses from nowhere to nowhere, accretions spit out of every gland, and the muscles tense and spasm like you are lifting three times your body weight.  Its violent. Its ugly and its messy.  And if God had not made it unbelievably fun the human race would have died out eons ago. ….Men are lucky they can only have one orgasm.  Do you know that women can have an hour long orgasm?” (From the TV series, House.)

 

Let’s keep it simple.  Women need to feel they are pleasing to someone and they need to be told they are loved (like maybe once a day).  A man needs to receive respect from a woman (like once a day) and to exercise some control over some aspect of the woman’s life so he gets that inflation that comes from control. 

    Don’t ask me why, though Peking Man and Neanderthal are now extinct because their brains had no neurological programming regarding gender differences.

 

 

AFTER DISCOVERING FRANZ BARDON’S BOOKS, YOU QUICKLY DEDICATE YOUR LIFE TO THE STUDY OF MAGIC THROUGH MASTERING BARDON’S SYSTEM.  WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS MOST LIKELY TO HAPPEN NEXT?

 

You become too upset to study because of conflicts involving 1. a girlfriend, 2, your wife, or 3. both your wife and your girlfriend.

 

You begin to question if you are on the right path because you can neither astral travel, levitate, or evoke spirits after three weeks of practice.

 

The roof of your house caves in on top of the desk where you left your Initiation into Hermetics book the first night you bring it home from the store.

 

Someone invites you to a conference on Franz Bardon and you reply, “I could never feel safe around people like that.”

 

A demon appears to you within two years to see if he can make you an offer you can’t refuse.

 

No demon appears.  Instead you discover a darkness growing inside yourself.  This darkness demands that you surrender your will and allow yourself to transmute into something horrible.  You try to resist with all your might but it appears that this darkness arises from the core of your being.

 

No, no.  All you need to do is balance the four elements in your soul producing a magical equilibrium.  Keep it simple and straightforward describing your strengths and weaknesses and working on the weaknesses one by one.  In no time the darkness is gone and you now feel at ease, full of peace, and vibrant with energy as never before. 

     The dark side is no match for the simple, straightforward and positive thinking of a young magician.  (Or am I confusing this with Star Wars when the Sith Lord says to his disciple with rancor and hatred dripping from his breath, “The Jeddi are no match for you.” Or some other movie where the character says “Look within and you may discover that Darth Vader is your father.”  Or, “Trust the force, Luke” says Obiwan.  “Yah, but which force to trust, light or dark?”  “Search your heart” but there is still a choice.  Gee, George Lucas made billions from this light/darkness mythological motif.  I wonder why that is?)

 

Well, it turned out you had nothing to fear after all.  You simply follow the directions as written and after five years of diligent practice you master IIH.  You then proceed to the second book on evocation.  Within a year you are communicating successfully with not only elementals but spirits of the earthzone.  After two more years you begin working with spirits of the planetary spheres.  At year twelve of your practice you move on to practicing the cosmic language.  This takes another ten years to master.  Finally after twenty-two years of practice you accept and fulfill a divine mission over the course of another ten years.  You then retire to live out the rest of your life sitting on the board and/or being a professor at an important magical university.  (But wait!  Are some of the other professors secretly working for the Dark Side?  Stay tuned for the exciting sequel to Magicians Gone Wild, winner of two Academy Awards.)

 

No, statistics show that 90% of those who have practiced the Bardon system for more ten years have started the system over from the beginning at least five times.

 

         

SOLOMON, ACCORDING TO THE BIBLE, WAS THE WISEST MAN WHO EVER WAS OR EVER WILL BE.  THIS IS FITTING BECAUSE SOLOMON’S TEMPLE IS PART  OF THE GREAT LEGACY OF WESTERN HEMETICISM ALONG WITH BOOKS ATTRIBUTED TO HIM SUCH AS THE LESSER AND GREATER KEYS OF SOLOMON.  BUT WHAT LESSONS FROM HIS LIFE MIGHT WE LEARN REGARDING THE LIMITATIONS OF WISDOM?

 

The first thing Solomon did when he woke up the next morning after gaining wisdom was to celebrate by getting drunk out of his mind.  He records this in his book, Ecclesiastes, in which he says, “I gave myself to drink.”  But because of the resulting hangover, he concludes, “Vanity of vanity. All is vanity.”

 

Solomon never got over the fact that his mother seduced his father into murdering his mother’s first husband and that this resulted in the death of Solomon’s older brother.  And so Solomon concludes in his Book of Proverbs, “Among a thousand women, there is not one you can trust.” (You might get away saying that on Bill O’Reilly but not on Oprah.)

 

Solomon never found true love.  This is indicated by the fact that he married seven hundred wives and had three hundred concubines and still had time to have affairs with Queens from other lands such as the Queen of Sheba.  These women also caused him to turn away from God and become an idolater by worshiping in pagan temples.  Solomon even began to give cryptic warnings to virgins to stay away from himself.  (See The Song of Solomon)

 

Solomon was also a rotten father. This is seen in that he did not leave any words of instruction to his son who ruled after him (unlike Solomon’s own father David whose last words to Solomon were specific and extensive.)  As a result Israel was divided into two nations immediately after Solomon’s death.

 

Solomon committed high treason against Israel by secretly dispatching a national treasure, the Ark of the Covenant, to Ethiopia in the care of his son whom he fathered with the Queen of Sheba.

 

God refused King David’s request to build the Temple of God because God said, “You have blood on your hands.”  Solomon, however, defiled God’s Temple by ordering an unarmed man who took sanctuary in the Temple to be slain before the altar.  This occurred shortly after Solomon was heard saying, “Nobody messes with me and gets away with it.” (Later on after the high priest complained about this desecration, Solomon was heard muttering: “He should have armed himself. That way he wouldn’t have died unarmed.”)

 

 

J.R.TOLKEIN, WHO BELONGED TO A CIRCLE OF WRITERS INCLUDING GEORGE MCDONALD, C.S. LEWIS, AND CHARLES WILLIAM, HAS REAL LESSONS FOR MAGICIANS IN HIS TRILOGY, THE LORD OF THE RINGS.  WHICH ARE AMONG THESE LESSONS:

 

It is very easy to lose your way--of the five wizards sent into Middle Earth by Vahalla (read Divine Providence) only Gandolf remained true to his mission. The others either got distracted or, like Sarumen, were turned to the dark side.

 

When pressed as to what Gandolf was doing sneaking around in the Dark Lord’s dungeon, he replied, “Finding things out.” As a matter of fact, a magician is able to violate the taboos of his society and seek forbidden knowledge because he too is “finding things out” to fulfill a sacred mission.

 

Gandolf, when pressed, was able to make his wand glow in the dark.  This is actually one of the basic exercises in Bardon’s training system.

 

Evil can cloak itself in the form of great beauty and charm. It then proceeds to bestow upon the world great and wondrous gifts. These gifts appear to enrich the spirituality of all people but are actually part of a sinister plot to take over the world. (Sauron when he forged and gave the original rings of power to the elves, the dwarves, and the human kings).

 

Only the individual who is free of all desire for power can safely be granted absolute power over the world.  (And it helps if you live under a hill, like to smoke pipes, and have hobbits as relatives.)

 

Whether you agree with his cause or not, like the evil emperor in Stars Wars known as Senator Palpatine, Sauron was doing something right (which the good guys never ever seem to get around to doing)—he was taking responsibility for the entire world (or galaxy).

 

 

WHICH KINDS OF MAGIC IN J.K. ROWLING’S BOOKS ABOUT HARRY POTTER ACTUALLY HAVE A REAL COUNTERPART IN OUR WORLD?

 

A magic cloak that enables you to be invisible. (Isn’t the Beta form of this currently being developed and sold by a Japanese firm?)

 

A magic map that tells you where everyone else is and in what direction they are moving. (Aren’t several versions of this currently available in Beta form for Seattle and San Francisco at least as far as cars and trucks moving on the city map?)

 

A jar that if you fall into it takes you back in time so you can experience first hand past events?  (isn’t this called psychometry or,  if you want to get fancy, psychic archeology?)

 

The ability to fly on broomsticks without the aid of aerodynamic wing design or gas propelled engines.  (didn’t I already mention that Boeing Aircraft is researching antigravity engines?)

 

Book and newspaper covers with animated three D images.  (Don’t most second graders have at least two palm held devices that can do better than this?)

 

 

MAGICANS SHOULD NOT MARRY OTHER MAGICANS BECAUSE?

 

You don’t want to hold your breath for this—your chance of meeting an available and acceptable magical partner of the opposite gender in any given year is about one in five hundred. (Of course, if you have attained immortality ….?)

 

It is ok if one partner embodies Receptive Intelligence and the other partner embodies Active Intelligence.

 

No, no, no.  It is only ok if the woman who is a magician is also a true submissive (Definition: a submissive woman is one who finds pleasure in pleasing a man--about 3% of the female population).  This is not a contradiction.  After all, it is the submissive who is always in charge because she gets to choose who will be her dom.  (A tip for you prospective doms—though you are in charge never ask a true submissive to do anything she does not already want to do.) (Note: A male who finds pleasure in pleasing a woman is not called a submissive.  He is called a gentleman.)

 

Since sex magic is the highest magic on earth you should be looking for a suitable partner who practices magic like yourself. Check the on-line Dating Service for Magicians Seeking Magic Sex Partners.

 

No, teach seminars on magic that demonstrate your knowledge. Nubile women are always attracted to men who are able to hold the attention of large groups of people.  One of the women attending will inevitably come on to you in a way that you can’t resist and at the same time she will respect you as an authority figure.

 

Actually it is a requirement if you wish to attain enlightenment in this incarnation to practice sex with a trained spiritual partner. (See the Introduction to The Wheel of Time by the Dalai Lama and then consult the on-line Yabums for Attaining Enlightenment or Your Money Back)

 

Magicians should not marry other magicians because--can you imagine having to use a sign up sheet and a calendar for whose turn it is to use the magic temple next?

 

Actually your best chance of meeting a suitable sex partner for Tantra or Taoist Sex Yoga is at a Tantric or Taoist Sex Yoga seminar.

 

A woman who really loves you will do for you whatever you want her to do.  Simply initiate her yourself.  This is possible only if her mind has not been contaminated by ideologies, intellectualism, metaphysical theories, etc.—that is, her flexibility diminishes to the extent she feels attached to or has a vested interest in fixed ideas. (Especially avoid women with strong superegos like those from Georgia, S. Carolina, or Virginia).

 

This discussion is nonsense because love is the greater magic--you just have to meet the right person as in “seek and you shall find.” (If you can use that to find God then you have at least a chance of getting it to work to find a woman).

 

Sure, of course you want a woman to share your spiritual life and walk beside you on your spiritual journey.  But guess what?  The first three things a spiritual woman is going to require of you is 1. that you pay her back for all the suffering men have caused women for the last eight thousand years by allowing her to dump all her anger and rage on you;  2. that you now manage her career so she can become assertive, successful, dynamic, and outgoing while you also meet the usual expectation for males that you “bring home the bread.” And 3. that you explain to her the female’s path of spiritual growth that involves developing the magnetic fluid by role modeling this feminine mode of feeling and action; (Have you considered the other option of doing seminars with this spiritual woman while marrying someone else like that attractive and loving but not so spiritual woman who has been after you for years?  Of course if you are a saint and/or masochist by all means ….)

 

On the other hand, if you are a female magician you probably already have the will side of your personality developed as well as the intuitive capacity to join with any aspect of the feminine mysteries.  And you are able to reproduce within yourself at will the magnetic fluid.  Pick a man therefore who can bring home the bread enabling you to be free to practice your magic undisturbed by worldly distractions.

 

 

WHICH KINDS OF PSYCHIC WARFARE FOLLOW THE GUIDELINES OF THE OFFICIAL RULE BOOK OF PSYCHIC WARFARE AND OTHER MAGICAL DUELS?

 

King Kamehameha’s use of kahunas in his brilliant (but ultimately self-defeating) strategy for forcing the king of the Big Island to surrender?

 

St. Columba’s duel in the sixth century with the Pick Druid to free an enslaved woman because everyone is “free in Christ?”

 

The druids and Wiccans using magic to force Hitler to call off his invasion of England?

 

The duel between the Dalai Lama’s weather controller and a Hindu shaman over whether it was going to rain or not?  (See the Dalai Lama’s weather controller’s unofficial biography)

 

That famous historical duel in the Bible between Balaam, the gentile prophet, and Moses, the chosen prophet of God, over whose blessing of Israel would appear on the walls of Jewish synagogues. (As everyone knows, Balaam won. The question is did he play fair?)

 

Padma Sambhava (the founder of Tibetan Buddhism in the ninth century) forcing all the demons in Tibet to vow to serve and protect the Dharma down through the ages? (This is why you never want to be in a room above the kitchen in a Tibetan monastery when the cooks burn the food—demons are more like mafia enforcers than cops and they are also so stupid they think that protecting food is part of protecting the Dharma.)

 

 

IN COMMUNICATING WITH NATURE SPIRITS, WHAT ARE THE RULES?

 

Never make the first move—always let them speak first to you.  Otherwise, according to the rules of astral plane covered in Who Gets to Possess Who? section 14b, they can declare you a “lost soul” thereby gaining salvage rights to your soul.

 

No matter how loving or friendly, all nature spirits and elemental beings are programmed to follow the rule that governs all magical realms--the strong rule over the weak.  That is, while you are seeking to master them they are seeking to master you.

 

If they give you a gift, such a gnome offering the Red Lion or Philosopher’s stone, it is only because they wish to possess your soul.

 

No, if a high ranking elemental being offers you a gift the gift acts as an entrance pass that enhances your ability to enter their elemental realm.  Just make sure you bring your own exit pass or else have a quick escape route in view.

 

The undines/mermaids are not trying to seduce you and then take possession of your soul.  It is just the nature of the magnetic fluid they embody—it automatically acts to magnetize your aura so you come to feel the way they do.  (Although there may be a few bets on the side over who can seduce you the quickest).

 

You do not need magic to commune with nature spirits.  You only need to do one of the following:

 

1. Really love nature and then nature spirits will really love you. 

 

2.  Keep a diary in which you imagine you understand their dreams and schemes.  Make an entry each day in which you imagine yourself doing whatever it is nature spirits do.  Magic can not compete with empathy like that. 

 

3. Feel the blood flowing through your veins and imagine you are rivers and the sea.  Feel the air in your breath and chest and imagine you are the winds, the biosphere, and the dream of being free.  Feel the weight of your body, the bones, and especially the legs and feet and imagine you are solid and enduring like the mountains, the earth, and the trees.  Feel the heat of your body, your desire and need and imagine you are the fire that consumes and also the fire that needs no fuel to create light to see.  I think that should do it: nature spirits will then welcome you as an honored guest among them.

 

 

Even if you follow the correct rules, what might happen with nature spirits?

 

They show up unexpectedly, obtrusively, and without being called.  Maybe they like hanging out with you.

 

You notice they do not speak in any human language.  Their communication is directly body to body, feelings to feelings, and mental imagery to mental imagery.  Kind of intimate and at times absolutely overpowering.

 

When something interesting happens, it occurs to you that what you just experienced is not described anywhere in human literature by any human mystic, poet, or philosopher.  

 

You find yourself dealing with forms of psychology that the human race will not discover for hundreds of years.

 

You notice that as you begin to see as they see, feel as they feel, and interact with the elements as they interact that your psychic powers are vastly enhanced.  But what you are perceiving is no longer the perceptions of a human beings.  Duh.

 

That unless you write down what you were doing for the last three hours you spent hanging out in the ocean with an undine, drifting though the sky with a sylph, walking beneath a mountain with a gnome, or discussing questions about the nature of fire with a salamander, everything that happened vanishes from your mind within five minutes of time.  (Why?  You have two hundred thousand years of neurological programming that makes you a human being.  They have millions of years of uniting with nature while remaining unseen.  Putting the two together in one state of consciousness is not as easy as it may seem.)

 

 

A STRONG CASE CAN BE MADE THAT THE SPIRITS OF THE EARTHZONE LISTED IN BARDON’S BOOK, THE PRACTICE OF MAGICAL EVOCATION, ARE ACTUALLY THE NAMES FOR DEMONS.  YOUR BEST RESPONSE:

 

What?  That’s it for me.  I am done with Bardon.

 

I do not have a clue as to why people go to baseball games.  I mean I could project my mind inside of a few fans and give you lots of details about what that experience is like for them.  But I am not going to do that.  I am not even curious. 

    Similarly, I do not have a clue as to why people sit in front of and play slot machines.  I am sure with a little telepathic probing, I could tell you in detail about the chemical and neurological changes in their brain chemistry that somehow can be construed as pleasure or if nothing else as addiction.  But I am not going to do it.  I see these people sitting there and I just can’t bring myself to get the least bit interested.

    OK.  You know what am going to say next, don’t you?  I do not have a clue as to why anyone is concerned about the names of the spirits Bardon appears to have misrepresented in his books.  I mean, I hear the arguments and the criticism, I read the discussions and conclusions.  But I am not even curious as to why this is a problem for them. 

    If someone, such as Bardon, gave me a description of a spirit, I could contact that spirit.  And you know, if they gave me a description of a spirit which either was completely wrong or which they thought did not even exist, I could still find and contact the spirit.  It is a very big universe.  There is every conceivable kind of spirit out there waiting to be contacted.  So I just don’t get what the fuss is about.  You think of a spirit and you connect to it.  It is that easy if you have trained your mind and psychic faculties.  Get a life.

 

As point of fact, if you attempt to contact a positive spirit but your purpose or intention is negative, you will automatically be directed to the negative spirit that is the counterpart of the positive one (this is due to the akashic switchboard which automatically sorts and transfers communications). 

     There is some controversy, however, as to whether a positive goal can be assigned to a demon since the demon would by its nature object to being ordered to pursue a positive end.  Kind of like walking up to a loan shark and saying, “Listen.  I am too busy to give this money to charity.  Here is ten thousand dollars. Would you see that it gets to whoever needs it the most?”  Yah, right.  The loan shark might either fall over laughing or else think it was an IRS sting operation and refuse to deal with you.  I mean, even demons have a code of ethics.

 

The explanation is quite simple—Bardon did not want the wrong people to abuse this sacred science for selfish purposes and so he hid the true names.  Any experienced magician can quickly discover for himself the true names of these spirits.

 

What is all the fuss?  You stand in front of the Grand Canyon and the sign reads, “Niagara Falls.”  Which are you going to believe, what is in front of your eyes or the sign?  You know, “A rose by any other name ….” And these spirits are not completely stupid.  When is the last time someone sent you his real name with his email?  The absence of the correct name does not prevent you from communicating.

 

In telepathy, any time you think about someone or a spirit there is instantly a connection between the two of you.  You don’t need a name.  The spirit appears or you sense its aura or you contact its mind.  As the girl said in the movie, “The little things don’t bother me.”

 

It will take one of Bardon’s original students to explain this or else you can wait for the forthcoming publication of The Magical Journals of Franz Bardon in five volumes for the answer. (by Merkur Press or was that Murmer Press or Mummy Press—I forget which.)

 

So what if I decided to call Emrudue in the sphere of the Moon say a name like Jimmy.  Then whenever I called Emrudue I formed a magical intent to contact him but aloud or silently spoke the word Jimmy instead.  I think Emrudue would know I was talking to him and respond.  I mean, someone can contact you on the internet referring to you using the wrong name.  You can look at the communication on its own terms and respond without getting upset, can’t you?  Don’t you think spirits are sufficiently intelligent to not be offended by mispronunciations and clerical errors? 

 

You are missing the point.  How could a world class grand master like Bardon allow mistakes to be published in his books?  Why, it is absolutely outrageous.  It is insulting and disrespectful to me as a student of magic.  I am totally offended. 

      The product delivered is not the same as what was being advertised.  Its fraud, I tell you.  It is unfair and I suspect a deliberate conspiracy is going on behind the scenes.  Yes, that is it.  Someone is messing with my magical career and trying to sabotage my spiritual motivation.  It might be the Masons.  Maybe the Knights Templar, maybe ….

      Well I tell you it is not going to work.  I am not going to put up with it.  White is white and black is black.  And if it is not all 100% white then it is obviously black.  Because I am just here to say I don’t do grey.  Reputation is everything in life.  And unless what you are offering is full of light (with no frayed edges, no little specks of dirt on the cuffs, and no loose threads) you are worthless in my sight.

 

 

FRANZ BARDON’S THIRD BOOK, THE KEY TO THE TRUE QUABBALAH, HAS BEEN LARGELY IGNORED BY THE PUBILC AS WELL AS MAGICIANS.  WHAT SHOULD BARDON HAVE EXPLAINED IN A DIFFERENT WAY TO GET BETTER SALES FOR HIS BOOK?

 

The Quabbbalah, Kabbalah, etc. is the highest magic on earth.  It represents the Spoken Word by which God created the universe.  The vowels and consonants in this cosmic language were used to give birth to the sky, the oceans, the mountains, the stars, earth, fire, air, water, and the spirit that endows all living beings with consciousness.  Bardon’s descriptions do not clearly connect each divine letter to the aspect of nature it represents.  Pictures or illustrations for each letter should also have been included to better stimulate the imagination.

 

No. Bardon should have used the actual Hebrew letters instead of Latin script.  People love mystical shit.  And the ancients all believed that their original languages were intrinsically magical and arose from divine origins.  I tell you people are going to believe a lot sooner if you tell them that Hebrew is a sacred language spoken by the angels and it is only to the Jews that God revealed this wisdom.  If you want a monopoly you got to make a lineage.

      (See the book, How to Invent A New Religion by Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology; if you don’t want to go to the trouble of practicing mysticism or inventing a new religion, see the book published by the Evangelical Self-Righteousness Press: How to Become a Televangelist for Money and Profit).

 

No, it is not really about book sales.  Like Orthodox Jewish Rabbis (wasn’t that word orthodox invented by the Christians in the first century? How come Jews get to use it?), you should insist that an individual be forty years of age and then teach only males this sacred practice.  However, exceptions are permitted if a female celebrity like Madonna takes an interest.  Initiate her because its good for publicity.

 

The problem is with the Catholic, Orthodox, and Protestant Christians.  They have created a religious environment hostile to spirituality.  Ask a Conservative Jewish Rabbi.  If he walks into a Christian bookstore and sees crosses with or without corpses on them he will say to himself, “I am the only one in this store not practicing idolatry.” 

     God is formless.  No prophet of the Old Testament did, could, or would have prophesized that the Messiah would be divine—an absolute impossibility in Judaism.  (Opps, there is that reference “mighty God,” every lasting father, etc. in Isaiah.  I will have to consult the Hebrew and the Jewish Mishna on this one.)

      By making Christ a member of a trinity the Christians put an end to the search for God by substituting a written creed, catechism, and set of doctrines.  The Word is Spoken and takes on flesh not through belief but through faith, conviction, and action.  This is significant because each cosmic letter has an akashic or formless state of awareness attached—and this is something Western civilization has long repressed.  You want Quabbalah, study it and then speak it in specific applications. 

 

No. no, no.  Bardon’s Kabbalah is for gentiles, not Jews. Different rules apply.  All that is needed is a few good men (or women).  Take a little of that old Jewish mysticism—“They shall not learn war anymore”—and add to it a dose of the new “Blessed are the peacemakers” and you get a small but dedicated group. These students of Bardon shall fulfill the old and new prophecies by making peace among the nations.  Not only that.  They shall also make peace with whatever civilizations the human race shall meet as it travels between the stars.

 

Young magicians are not permitted to buy and read The Key to the True Quabbalah unless they are current in their dues to the Magician’s Guild.

 

Whose eyes do not see the Mystery?  Whose tongue does not taste the bliss?  Whose ears have not heard the Wonder?  Whose thoughts do not bear witness to the truth? 

      It is everywhere and all around us.  It is in every breath.  The sky is part of the Voice of God that embodies the wisdom of the universe—creating, ordering, unfolding, setting forth seasons, the illumination of lights, the cycles of time.  And at the center of this Great Mystery is the human mind.

   It is in the oceans, the water, the rivers and streams, the rain, the icy cold poles, the lakes, the well—it is in our dreams: to be embraced and to embrace, to give birth to and through each other, to love, to flow, to receive and to give, to be within and part of every heart—who can fail to feel and to notice?

     The electricity in the heart beat, that sails down the nerves, that explodes and implodes within the synapse, the ions exchanging places at the wall of every body cell; and the galaxies whirling in space, the stars exploding, the light proclaiming, exclaiming, bearing witness to the Glory of Creation that echoes through the universe and speaks plainly even in the darkest place. 

   The language of God, His voice, the sounds and consonants need no human mystic or lineage, no orthodox or unorthodox doctrine, no human teacher at all is required to learn to speak as the Creator.  His Creative Art is all around us.  One only need to open his heart and become one with this wonder, the bliss, the powers, the separation and union of opposites. 

    Mastering the Quabballah is as simple as that.  The Magi I tell you were initiates of this.  (For further references, see the gentile prophet Balaam’s classic unpublished work, Creating as God Creates, Or, Avoid Screwing Yourself with Belief, Faith, or Devotion—Go Directly to God; see also the book by the Magi--We Kings, We Follow Star, We Give Gifts, We Vanish in the Night).

 

 

POP QUIZ, PART III

 

 

THE WAY A MAGICAN JOINS HIMSELF TO GOD IS:

 

He stands in the center of his magic circle and thinks to himself, “I am joined to God.”

 

He picks one of the names of God from the Old Testament such as Elohim, Adonai, JHWH, Eheiah, etc. and then clearing his mind of all thought allows this name to sound in his mind.  He then follows that vibration until he enters the Presence of God.  (Note: one kind of evidence for your progress is the presence of St. Elmo’s fire—the hairs on your skin become electrified, begin to hum, and to glow.)

 

That is absolutely ridiculous.  Those names have no magical or spiritual energy attached to them unless you pronounce them simultaneously in three planes—the mental, astral, and physical—and understand something of how to “pronounce” the Quabbalistic or cosmic letters from which they are composed.

 

No, a magician joins himself to God by spending six hours each week contemplating the Tree of Life on four planes for each sephiroth.  After thirty years, God drops by out of curiosity to ask the magician why he is wasting so much time on something so ridiculous.

 

You join yourself to God first and foremost by thinking God’s thoughts, feeling the feelings within God’s heart, and envisioning as God envisioned the purposes for which He has created the universe.

 

You join yourself to God by practicing the akashic level of each of the cosmic letters in the Quabbalah.

 

No dummy.  Practicing the akashic levels of the cosmic letters joins you to the impersonal aspect of God, that is, to Divine Providence.  Joining yourself to a personal God requires a different procedure. 

 

You join yourself to God by imagining the four elements, earth, air, fire, and water in their divine aspects which are immorality/divine work, cosmic wisdom or omniscience, absolute or omnipotent will, and all-embracing love or omnipresence.  Practice, practice, practice.  There comes a point when you find God sitting nearby doing whatever it is that God does with all those qualities of His.

 

A magician joins himself to God by using both invocation and evocation.  In invocation, he rises up half way to meet God. (“stirring himself up” through inspiration, perhaps a state of ecstasy, etc.)  In evocation, like the gentile prophet Balaam, or the angel Gabriel, or the two witnesses, or in countless other ways (for ultimately we each have our own way), he directly enters the presence of God.  Invocation is more drawing God near through the love and inspiration in your heart; evocation is rising up to meet God through an absolute power of will.  The magician uses both methods.   

 

 

DIVINE PROVIDENCE IS

 

It’s a “divine” province often mistaken for Shambala which is actually located three hundred miles to the northwest and not due to materialize on earth for another 270 years.  (Shambala is not to be confused with Shangrila—an outpost of Shambala that materializes for a day or so every hundred years.)

 

Divine Providence is the impersonal aspect of God.  This impersonal aspect was indicated by the Apostle Paul in his reference to the prophet from the pagan island of Crete who wrote—“Him in whom we live, move, and have our being.”   

    This reference by the Apostle Paul serves as the basis for the founding of numerous schools for prophets both Christian and pagan which down though the ages have nurtured and supported the Christian church and in fact all genuine spiritual traditions.  (What schools for prophets?  Opps, this must have been in an alternative universe.)

 

Divine Providence is a way station located approximately two thirds of the way between purgatory and heaven.  Its primary directives are offering inspiration, guidance, and supervision.  It does this pro bono and outreach is on a case by case basis. 

 

Divine Providence is the collective of all higher ranking spiritual beings whose inspiration derives from God.  They engage in activities such as overseeing various evolutions and planetary systems, civilizations, etc.  They are of high enough rank that they act on their own initiative and freely innovate within their specific areas of jurisdiction and supervisory capacity.  In a phrase, they (or Divine Providence) might say, “I create, I inspire, I guide.  I make all things new in the fullness of time.”

 

Divine Providence is the “One Light” that shines throughout and that illuminates the entirety of creation.  The entire universe is sustained, derived, and guided by this light.  It is intelligent, conscious, and yet without form or image.  It is self-illuminating, self-existent, and boundless in its power and radiance. 

     (By the way, after you reach a certain high level in your development you are free to dissolve your personal ego and identity and join with “the light.”  (For a complete discussion of the advantages and disadvantage of “dissolving one’s ego and joining with the light” see the book, Manage Your Karmic Account Now So You Can Become A Saint Upon Retirement.)

 

 

WHICH ARE REASONS FOR JOINING THE MAGICIAN’S GUILD?

 

More and more spirits are sharing with each other their data bases regarding human magicians.  If your first evocation is not completely professional following high standards and in the correct format you could be black listed.  This could seriously interfere with any future contact with spirits.  (This happened to Crowley whose first evocation was out of doors, totally inept, and interrupted by a constable.  Spirits never took him seriously after that.)

 

The Magician’s Guild can help insure that your magical paraphernalia (robe, wand, cap, shoes, socks, skin lotion, underwear, perfume, hair gel, etc.) are of the highest quality increasing your chances for success.  See The Complete Catalogue for Beginning and Advanced Magicians.  Your Guild membership fee includes free on site assistance with all your evocation needs.

 

When your practice attains a professional level, the Guild will offer you a “green light” or official stamp of approval.  To say the least this “green light” practically guarantees future success in your chosen area of magical specialization.

 

Being a member of the Magician’s Guild allows you to waive any out of state tuition at any magical university around the world.

 

Membership also bring automatic participation in the Magician’s Guild’s Coop. The Coop allows you to receive the lowest interest payments on your student loans, Guild credit cards, and low interest car and home loans.  Also included in your membership is access to magical energy accounts that will reinforce the effectiveness of any spells or words of power you may perform.  Simply choose a five digit numerological based pin number related to your birth date and last name.

 

The Guild also maintains exclusive archives containing magical diaries, writings of the Tertons, magical and other books saved from the library of Alexandria, and historical documents for example the written records of William Blake and W.B. Yeats showing them to have practiced magic as druids.

 

The Guild also offers extensive on-line seminars for members in good standing on a vast assortment of magical topics.

 

Join today!  Simply send a brief telepathic message to the Guild admissions stating your occupation, annual income, charitable activities, and a brief resume of your magical abilities and accomplishments.  Shamans, wizards, sorcerers, priests, Sufis, Kabbalists, diviners, and prophets are also welcome.  Scholarships are available on a case by case basis.

 

 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING ARE POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS FROM PRACTICING MAGIC?  Part I.

 

You feel your consciousness has been invaded by an alien presence that you are unable to define or remove.

 

You feel suddenly violent when things don’t go your way.  After all, don’t you possess a magical will?

 

You feel like magic has become a mistress that has taken possession of your life. (So naturally your wife complains that you are married to magic so that now she feels that you are treating her like a mistress).

 

You feel profoundly important part of the time and completely worthless at other times.  (this is the standard inflation and deflation of ego).

 

You feel that magic will finally allow you to gain the acceptance and recognition you desire from others and the world or maybe even a few friends.

 

You feel superior to other people.

 

Like just about everyone who is in jail feels—“The world owes me” and (since I am superior to other people) “I can take what I want.”

 

You feel somewhat like a not so mature Aquarian might feel—not really part of this world.  That is, part of your consciousness is stuck someplace else such as on the astral plane.  So you can’t be fully present in the here and now because an actual percentage of your physical brain, like ten or twenty per cent, is on the astral plane.  The neurons are firing; they are just not referencing reality.

 

 

IN THE PHRASE--TO WILL, TO KNOW, TO DARE, AND TO KEEP SILENCE--“TO KEEP SILENCE” MEANS

 

You do not cast your pearls before swine by giving to others what they may mock or scorn.

 

You stay in the moment interacting with others in a way that remains within the boundaries of what they are able to understand and within the range of feelings they can handle.

 

To keep silence means you do not share magic with the uninitiated.

 

To keep silence refers to protecting and nurturing a spiritual vision in your heart the way a fetus is nurtured in the dark, protective womb of a woman.

 

To keep silence means that you have an internal stillness that is continuously connected to and in harmony with your core values and your deepest dreams and visions.

 

Silence embodies a magical power—it is the power of detachment and negation in which you distance yourself from any and all distractions that interfere with doing what you feel is important.

 

No, no, no.  You have to look to Solomon for the answer to what “keeping silence” means.  See The Book of Proverbs: “Even a fool who keeps silence is considered wise.”

 

The wisdom, power, and love shining within the heart which has mastered stillness is the beginning and the end of all the mysteries.   (from the undine Isaphil) In this case, silence has been upgraded to mean stillness.  This stillness is like a magic mirror—it reflects within itself the union of the earth, the heavens, the divine, and mortals. (Martin Heidegger).

 

Within the earth element is found the silence that nourishes a dream so it can unfold.  It is the stillness within our hearts that measures our dreams, their beauty and their power, and then endures in its work until they transform the world. (from the undine Istiphul)

 

Silence is primarily a survival technique.  There are those who are out in front of things conquering and succeeding by being aggressive.  There are those who are assertive.  They respect their own needs and ideas and others’ as well.  There are those who are passive—they are too shy to fully participate in the game of life. 

    And there are those who are passive aggressive, that is, they know if they were to assert themselves they would get stomped into the ground.  So they find ways of fighting back that both express their anger at being held down and which protect themselves from being caught.

      Silence in this sense can be a passive aggressive technique—you strike when it is least expected as in utilizing the element of war called surprise.  Silence can also be seen as belonging to those who are not only aggressive.  It is the primary technique of those who end dominating, controlling, or, if we are to cast this in more positive terms, guiding the unfolding of the world. 

     This is because power, and especially absolute power, requires that you keep a great many secrets.  It requires that you master the virtue of patience—you wait until precisely the right moment to act.  It is required for spending years if not decades in preparation that lays the foundations for fulfilling your vision. 

   In a sense, then, silence is a divine virtue—it extends right from the moment of conception of a vision through the process of laying the foundation, preparing to act, acting, and then following through until your vision is fully manifested in a stable and permanent manner. 

     In a nutshell, it is silence that enables you to stay on track and not waste energy on distractions, doubts, self-validations, and a craving for praise and recognition.  The virtue of silence separates the weak from those who wish to operate at their peak.

 

And now for a word from one of our associates, an honorary member of the board of the Magician’s Guild, i.e., the gnome named Muscar.

Hello?  Muscar?  Could you make a brief statement regarding your perspective on the mystery of silence? Thank you.

 

                        Muscar

 

I am a listening silence!  

I am consciousness without form or thought

Moving underground.

I both reveal the earth's secrets

And I am where treasures are hidden so well

Only the eyes of a seer

Can divine their location.

Time and age do not burden me.

I am constancy amid change.

I have made sketches of mountains

As they rose steep and new

But which are long since gone

Now but dirt beneath your shoes.

In my time frame

The Himalayan Mountains and the Andes are but the tents

A great warrior has pitched in the night

And packs up again

When he breaks camp at dawn.

If you want to attune to me,

To match your moves to mine,

Whether to party, chat,

Discuss, linger, lurk, or socialize,

Then be still and open

Such that the stars are no longer distant and cold

But young again--

Children playing a game of ball,

Dancing, singing, full of laughter and delight,

So excited you notice them shifting

Their constellations

As they run through the night.

Then you will hear me whisper in your ear--

Your race has dreams

Like the dreams of the earth Herself

Like the songs that stream from the stars

Ah, but so few of you listen

To your dreams

Or bother to enter

The gates that lead into the silences of the heart.

But I feed on silence.

It is who I am.

It is my home and my dwelling.

And its transformations are my wisdom. 

So, where to find me?

My paths lead to the philosopher's stone

And of nature's quintessence

I have many trade secrets to share.

The conversations I hold with your race

Have been going on

Since before you learned to build towns

You bet I have a few stories I could tell!

So when you are weary or in despair

Feeling lonely or discouraged,

A soul in need of repair

Come round and see me.

I can be most entertaining.

I love parties which celebrate the seasons!

I love the songs of ancient bards

Who train for seven years

In caves of dark isolation. 

I love alchemists who spend a lifetime of refining

To hold in their hands the red lion!

Though once we meet

I probably won't miss seeing you

For a century or two--

You see,

My first love shall always be

The earth beneath your feet.

 

 

Still reading about “keeping silence?”  Gees, you must be hard core.  Well, that was Muscar.   And that stuff about the stars being young again playing a game of ball?  Well, how about this:

 

Listen! Can you hear it?

The sound of galaxies whirling, spinning, and colliding

Sailing on celestial winds?

 

In a dark place

Silence blossoms

Revealing the distances separating and uniting all things—

I hear the Song of the Universe

 

Hmm.  Perhaps silence is good for listening as an artist might listen who wishes to hear the voice of the Mystery speaking, singing, and expressing its Art.

 

What?  You are going to dump on us more of your poetry?  Well, just get it over with.

From the Salamander Itumo—master of thunderstorms (who is another visiting professor at the Magic University)

       

      Itumo, "There was a time long ago when I was small and

insignificant.  Causing lightning to strike was beyond my ability.  I was so

weak I could not cause a spark to leap.  Neither atoms nor molecules would

listen when I spoke.  The attraction they felt for each other was beyond my

perception.

            "Yet even then I was still what I am now--an intelligence with the will to

master electricity.  My commission was also the same as now: to forge paths

where none exist between mind, matter, and spirit. 

I embody the mystery of how

to gather strength in silence until the power that is unleashed is great enough

to cross every gulf so the desires of the heart can be fulfilled.  The silence

that cloaks my will is the same silence woven into the sky that holds the stars

within a vast embrace of stillness."

             "Then did you develop your power on your own?" I ask.

           Itumo replies simply and to the point, "There are times when you must act

alone for there are no guides provided."

            Itumo and I just stare into each other's eyes measuring the depths and how

we have explored silence in our separate ways.  Itumo says, "Because something

is simple it does not mean it is easy.  I am saying you already know how to

enter a place of silence where the only thing that exists is your vision and the

power of your own imagination."

 

 

THE SUITCASE CONTAINING THE CODES FOR LAUNCHING AN ALL OUT NUCLEAR ATTACK BY THE U.S. OR RUSSIA WAS ACTUALLY OPENED FOR THE FIRST TIME DURING WHICH ONE OF THE FOLLOWING HISTORICAL EVENTS:

 

It happened when a Russian sub off of Cuba was about to launch a nuclear tipped torpedo if the U.S. navy moved another quarter mile closer during the Cuban missile crisis.

 

It occurred in the fifties under President Eisenhower who threatened Russia with all out nuclear retaliation if Russia invaded Iran in an attempt to gain a warm water port.

 

It occurred when the U.S. threatened all out nuclear war with Russian if Russia followed through with its planned preemptive nuclear strike against China.

 

It occurred during a war game in the eighties at NORAD when a computer game was taken as the real thing and the screens showed Russian nuclear weapons beginning to explode in Northern Canada.

 

It occurred just after the fall of the Berlin Wall when the Russian ambassador informed the U.S. president that Russia actually had a fail safe device in place for a computer launch against the U.S. but was not quite sure how to disarm it or even if disarming it was possible.

 

It occurred well after the fall of the Berlin wall when President Yeltsin of Russia was told a missile was minutes away from hitting Moscow.

 

 

A LOST SOUL IS

 

A lost soul is a soul that is lost.  This occurs when the silver cord joining the astral body to the physical body is somehow severed or severely damaged as when inexperienced individuals attempt astral travel.  (See the companion guide to Quick and Easy Astral Travel known as Twenty Ways to Loose Your Soul While Astral Traveling—written in commemoration of the twenty who never came back).

 

A lost soul is a soul in need of soul retrieval.  Soul retrieval is possible when only part of the astral body is damaged.  Very intense emotions, loss, grief, or tragic love affairs can result in part of one’s astral body being captured or “borrowed” by another person.  Special astral collection agencies are available (for a small fee) to reacquire stolen astral life (deep emotions of well-being, happiness, satisfaction, contentment) and return it to the original owner.

 

Lost souls are souls that have died and left unfinished business on earth.  They can’t move on and they can’t go back.

 

Lost souls, (as compared to hungry ghosts), are souls that basically “float” about in a light green colored abyss.  For some this is a real astral terrain and for others it is merely a kind of astral haze that overshadows and surrounds their auras while still alive.

 

Lost souls are souls that haven’t found their niche, they don’t know where they belong, they have lost their way home, or their social and emotional distance from other people results in a slow deterioration of the vibrancy and animation of their astral body or ability to feel.

 

A lost soul is simply a soul that has lost its ability to hope, dream, or search for a better life.

 

A lost soul is a “master” who has died without having passed down his teachings to at least one student.

 

Technically speaking, there is a difference between a lost soul and an individual who is suffering from being under the influence of a possessing entity.  A ghost or thought form or negative being can attach itself in a minor way to an individual’s chakas—usually the crown chakra.  This external influence severely hinders the performance of an individual’s conscience such that in effect the individual loses the ability to learn anything new from experience.  A lost soul often is in the exact same predicament.

     In neurological terms, the part of the brain that engages in self-reflection and seeks harmonious results is shorted out.  We see this in everyday life when an abused person inadvertently identifies with his or her perpetrator in order to survive or a hostage turns to supporting the kidnapper.  The situation continues until there is a sudden increase in brain energy usually through a shocking jolt to the nervous system.  This can be do to an unpleasant encounter with reality or another person sending a burst of pure vitality into the individual’s spine. 

 

 

HOW IS A FEMALE MAGICAN DIFFERENT FROM A MALE MAGICIAN?

 

A female magician does not treat her magic wand or magic sword as if it is part of her own body.  Then again, a crystal ball and a silver chalice have meanings for her that a male will never comprehend.

 

When she uses the words “feeling” or “feelings” she actually knows what the words means.

 

She is not obsessed with sex or sex magic.

 

She actually cares about other people and the world.

 

People who know nothing about magic (that is, “ordinary people”) enjoy being around her.

 

When she posts a request on internet for a partner she gets hundreds of replies.  A male magician is lucky to get one or two.

 

A female magician’s robe has better stitching and embroidery.

 

She knows that God is both masculine and feminine—that you can not have a God without a Goddess.

 

To the extent she masters the magnetic fluid, to that extent she is capable of altering the fate of mankind.

 

 

SPIRITUAL ANTHROLOOGY (AS COMPARED TO PHILOSPHICAL ANTHROPOLOGY OR ONTOLOGY) STUDIES RELIGIOUS, OCCULT, AND SPIRITUAL TRAINING SYSTEMS.  IT CONSIDERS WHAT AND HOW MUCH TIME PRACTITIONERS ACTUALLY SPEND ON DIFFERENT ACTIVITIES.  IT ALSO COMPARES WHAT PEOPLE SAY THEY ARE DOING TO WHAT THEY ACTUALLY DO.

   FROM THE POINT OF VIEW OF SPIRITUAL ANTHROPOLOGY, A GENUINE SPIRITUAL PRACTICE REQUIRES MORE THAN A HALF HOUR OF TIME.  BY THIS DEFINITION PROTESTANT CHRISTIANITY IS THE ONLY RELIGION IN THE HISTORY OF THE PLANET THAT HAS NO GENUINE SPIRITUAL TRADITION.  THE REASON FOR THIS IS:

 

The Protestant Ethic has kept Protestants so busy working hard, being productive, and living a moral but repressed emotional and sexual life that there can be no time for any spiritual activity.

 

For a Protestant, reading the Bible is a spiritual activity.  Therefore Protestant do in fact qualify as having a genuine spiritual practice.  (Even if they substitute the idolatry of worshiping the written word—see their avid tradition of memorizing verse and chapter—for worshiping the Living God who Speaks equally in every moment and to every age of the world. 

 

Protestants are cheerleaders for capitalism.  It took thousands of years to set in place the requisites for developing the capitalistic economic system.  No system on earth could possibly be more in compliance with the Jewish commandment: “Be fruitful, multiply, and have dominion over the earth.”  And if Protestants are anything it is that they are imitators of Judaism (the Apostle Paul did not think he was inventing a new religion, just upgrading Judaism, and adding a few gentiles, with a one time, once and for all sacrifice and a few new rituals and holidays added later on.)

 

Protestants, like the first century Christian bishops, demanded that their followers be orthodox as in “Do not go out and seek God on your own.  Just believe what I tell you to believe.”  And so, as one Christian writer puts it, “Seeking God was an Old Testament thing.  We now have Christ and so do not need to seek.”  (Disregard that question, Should a people not seek their God?” uttered by God through the voice of a prophet.)

 

The Book of Common Prayer authorized by Queen Elizabeth of England specifically forbids “seeking God’s face.”

 

Actually Martin Luther wrote about meditation in his writings.  But since that time meditation has declined until it finally reached the absolute minimum—see Billy Graham’s statement, “Prayer should be no longer than a minute.”

 

No, it is all about money, taxation, and who gets to control your tithing. Martin Luther was pissed at the transferring of German wealth to Rome.  Germans should tithe, not buy indulgences, and those tithes should stay home. 

   When the Pharaoh of Egypt demanded a better taxation system, his ministers invented the first language in order to keep track of who had paid and who had not.  And so Martin Luther’s first act was to translate the Bible into German.  No need for Latin, no need for transference of wealth outside, and no need for those Catholic monasteries or contemplations--you should go to church to hear a sermon.  You should not be trying to make up a sermon on your own and, above all else, give your money to us and we professors of theology will do the rest.  

    And the bottom line?  When the Apostle Paul (the idol of all evangelists) decided to make a deal with the Christian Jews in Jerusalem to accept his gentile converts, he collected money as a bribe to sweeten the gentile’s appeal. But the Romans thought Paul was using the money for an uprising so they had him arrested.  But it didn’t matter.  Jerusalem fell a few years later.  But because a New Testament prophet foretold the problems Paul would face, Protestants have always hated prophets and have banned them from practicing.)

 

Nonsense.  Protestant Christianity produces individuals who are pure, very enthusiastic, and who trust in the Lord.  How can you knock that?

 

No, Protestant Christianity may not satisfy the needs of hard core introverts but it is the only religion on earth in which an individual can feel that his faith gives him a direct connection to God who will bless him in all that he undertakes.  How can you beat that?

 

 

ACCORDING TO THE SORCEROR DON JUAN IN THE WRITINGS OF CARLOS CASTANEDA, ANYONE SEEKING TO UNDERSTAND THE TRUTH MUST HAVE SPENT TIME WORKING WITH A PETITE DICTATOR.—THAT IS, AN INDIVIDUAL WHO SEEKS TOTAL DOMINATION OVER ANYONE AROUND HIM.  THE REASON FOR THIS IS

 

According to Don Juan, you can only enter the Nagual, that is, the formless state of awareness, after you have lived under and survived the petite dictator.   This is because it takes absolute courage to face the unknown of the Nagual. Such courage is only mastered by those who have extricated themselves from slavery and domination through their own initiative.

 

To master the unknown you must be free of all fear.  Such freedom is only possible if you have looked in the face (for example a father, mother, boss, mafia don, chief of police, national dictator, etc.) that creates the worst fear. 

 

No, the Heart Sutra clearly states that to free yourself of all fear you have to have to perceive how form and formlessness interpenetrate each other.  The problem is not an individual who enslaves others to a false will that is based on illusion.  It is reality itself (samsara) that is the dictator that enslaves those who consider its illusions to be real.

 

The human being who acts as a petite dictator is nothing else than an embodiment of the Guardian of the Threshold.  This Guardian’s power is derived from guaranteeing the reality of the social order and the agreed upon consensus about what the world is and what it means.  To enter the unknown, you must pass beyond this Guardian who says to each of us—“Turn back.  What lies beyond will destroy you.”  In other words, the only way to attain to any degree of happiness is by acting in compliance with and validating a social world through which we acknowledge and validate each other. 

 

Actually the Guardian is telling it the way it is.  To see the truth in its full power means the annihilation of your personal identity.  To survive this experience you have to be aware without using thoughts or images to define yourself.  And you can not use any conventional reality or consensual truth as a reference point to understand your experience. 

 

No, its an ego thing.  The petite dictator is your typical Alpha male who wants control over everything and is pretty good at getting it.  To enter the unknown you will need a much bigger ego, a much greater will—a will with the power that can take hold of the unknown and transform it into something understandable.  Therefore, you do not escape from the petite dictator.  You absorb and transform him into yourself.  (But try not to kill your father or employer—Oedipus).

 

“Fear is the mindslayer.” (see the movie/book Dune).  You have to go beyond fear for the mind to become clear.  And our enemies are our best teachers.  So you have to have a really great enemy in order to attain a really clear mind.  Otherwise you will never be motivated to seek and then to find.  (See the good cop/bad cop approach to interrogation or the Tibetan practice of giving a disciple two gurus—one who is very sweet and kind and another who is very hostile and bitter. Also the Tibetans are fond of identifying with wrathful deities designed to scare the shit out of your own fear.)

 

 

JUDIASM IS CONSIDERED TO BE A PROPHETIC RELIGION BECAUSE THE NATION OF ISRAEL WAS CREATED TO FULFILL A DIVINE PURPOSE. (NAMELY TO STRIVE WITH GOD FOR A BLESSING). EVERY GENERATION HAD A PROPHET IN ISRAEL FOR A THOUSAND YEARS. 

     THE HOPI INDIANS CONSIDER THAT THEY TOO WERE CREATED TO FULFILL A DIVINE PURPOSE. THE HOPi HAVE HAD PROPHETS AMONG THEM (THE TWO HORN SOCIETY) FOR WELL OVER A THOUSAND YEARS. (MORE LIKE 1500 YEARS).    

      WHICH ONE OF THE FOLLOWING METHODS (EMPLOYED BY THE DIVINE OR THROUGH THE PROPHETS) WAS NOT SHARED IN COMMON BY BOTH OF THESE PROPHETIC RELIGIONS?

 

 

They both have used fire to destroy the unbelievers. (note the charred artifacts found in the archeological ruins of Sodom and Gomorrah)

 

They both used earthquakes to destroy the unbelievers or slackers. (for example, after Moses came down from Sinai)

 

They both used floods to destroy the unbelievers. (too obvious to mention)

 

They both use famine to destroy the unbelievers, the lazy, and those who strayed from the way.

 

They both used foreign armies to attack their own cities or nation.  (The Jewish captivity in Babylon)

 

They both used their own army to slay their own citizens. (Consider the sad story of Awatovi)

 

They both indirectly used their armies to allow another army to attack their cities.  (E.g., the Hopi Sun clan [the tribal armed forces] telling the Navaho that they would “be out of town next Tuesday so there will be no one on duty for defense.”])

 

They both used disease, whether by angel or, e.g., by distributing small pox contaminated clothing, to cause the death of their own people. (See Hopi oral tradition).

 

 

COMPLETE THE FOLLOWING: IF YOU ARE DEAD AFTER YOU DIE WHAT ARE YOU BEFORE YOU ARE BORN?  (asked by Jimmy, the son of a former Miss America)

 

Obviously, you are a disincarnate entity.

 

You are a soul waiting to be born.

 

Having incarnated before in other lives, you are between incarnations. (say in the Bardo)

 

No, before you are born you inhabit a different astral body.  This astral body “dies” before you are born because you are about to assume a new astral body.

 

Wrong again.  Your former astral body that you abandon when you are born is quite capable of surviving for centuries though it is no longer inhabited by your soul. 

 

No, before being born you are floating around blissed out of your mind in this warm, sheltered, nurturing space.  Everything is so easy and free that you think if the rest of life is like this then let’s get it on.

 

How far “before you are born?”  You are a fetus in the womb or an impregnated egg or then again if there are two identical eggs that have divided and so are perfect clones you get to flip a coin to determine which one to enter.

 

No, according to the Koran, a soul does not enter the fetus until the fourth month.  Therefore, since it the soul that makes for a living being there can be no legal rights—it is the soul that gives life.

 

Before you are born, you are a “divine spark” waiting to ignite within a life.

 

 

WHICH ARE THE BEST RECOMMENDATIONS FOR PRACTICING BARDON?

 

I can’t think of any.

 

The system is actually straightforward and step by step. Follow the steps as Bardon recommends and you will do fine though it may take slightly longer than you first thought.

 

Absolutely everything in Bardon is in the first three chapters of IIH.  Master these and you have in effect mastered the entire system.

 

It helps if you have already been practicing meditation for ten years before picking up a Bardon book.

 

Ok.  Let’s go over this once more.  A spirit’s name or sigil is like an internet address or URL.  Your psychic senses are like your modem connection.  Your ability to interpret your psychic perceptions and impressions is your service provider.  No modem or service provider, no email.  Got it?

 

The purpose for working with the Bardon system must come from you.  Make no assumptions.  Remember always the saying, “The wise men of old were alert like men walking on thin ice ….”  Don’t ever forget that.

 

 

A MAGICIAN IS MOST LIKE WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING?

 

A magician is like a Navy Seal: he is a highly trained and an intelligent member of the special forces with his own direct uplink to command central.  (“There are no dumb Navy Seals. If you are dumb, you drown.”  Also, there was a Navy Seal who was trained to disarm any American or Russian nuclear weapon—thus a Navy Seal is the kind of guy you want on your team.)

 

An unrostered agent (that is, no paper trail as in very secret and leaves no traces) for the CIA in which the CIA is Divine Providence.  By the way, unrostered agents are very good at “keeping silence.”

 

A Swami with an ashram, disciples, and a small slush fund on the side.

 

Like Balaam, a gentile or “heathen” prophet who could speak directly with God and who could usually obtain God’s blessings at will. (though it helps to have a donkey who speaks and can warn you about avenging angels.  By the way, the talking donkey and the snake in the garden, according to Hebrew legend, were two animals left over from the first creation which was later abandoned).

 

Like Gandolf, a higher being sent into the world disguised in human form to accomplish a mission.

 

Like a viceroy from England or an imperial censor from the Emperor of China who has complete independence and power to render judgments and finalize agreements on behalf of the crown/Emperor. (read Divine Providence).

 

Like a new student at a huge university where all the other students and most of the professors are invisible and beyond sensory detection.  As the sun slowly rises, however, the light begins to shine illuminating from within this student’s vision.  And now behold he sees that many other sojourners like himself are collectively entering the Halls of Wisdom (for initiation is collective) and collectively sharing in a great wonder that can only serve to enrich mankind. (Note: the editor was not completely certain if the above paragraph falls under this topic describing magicians or the earlier topic describing lost souls.)

 

A magician is like a knight of old during an age of chivalry.  He protects women, children, and the vulnerable.  He trains to be strong.  He fights against wrong.  He strives to be noble, courteous, and honorable. 

    If given a quest, he is relentless to pursue it and you can bet he will do it.  His heart is like a lion.  His thoughts like an eagle and his body like a boar about to charge.  His eyes have seen wonder.  His voice can speak with thunder.  And his hands will establish his work upon the earth.

 

Saints and sages can afford to feel content because of the bliss they radiate and the wisdom they contain.  But the role of a magician is more.  He is in a position to assume a degree of responsibility for the world.   He exercises oversight, guides and inspires, and also helps mankind get through its bottlenecks. 

 

 

WHO MOSTLY LIEKLY SAID, “WEEP NOT WHEN DEATH AND FATE TAKE AWAY--EVERY ENDING, SEPARATION, FARELWELL, AND GOODBYE IS A SACRED RITE IN MY EYES.”

 

The Oracle of Delphi to which Socrates appealed his death sentence.

 

Buddha while sipping tea with Kama, the Lord of Demons.

 

Shiva responding to Arjuna’s request for an absolute weapon.

 

The chief Judge of the Sphere of Saturn.

 

Queen Elizabeth when she sent Sir Francis Drake on a secret mission around the world.

 

Albert Einstein responding to his first wife when she mentioned his promise to her that both their careers would be of equal importance.

 

 

THE REASON A MAGICIAN AND A PROFESSIONAL ACTOR HAVE A LOT IN COMMON IS

 

The both practice the “internal method” of acting.  They both concentrate on assuming another identity and really getting into the part.

 

They both know that the role they are assuming is not who they really are.  It is a fiction, something made up, and imaginary part that serves a temporary purpose and that is all. 

 

They both explore their major life experiences and feelings in order to develop their professional skills.

 

The magician may often hide his true identity as a magician the way an actor hides his own personality in playing a part.

 

They both play many roles on the stage of life.

 

They both spend a lot of time off stage behind the curtains waiting for their entrance.

 

No, they both know that life is art—its about creating and expressing yourself.

 

 

Copyright ©2005 by William Mistele.  All rights reserved.

 

 

            Pop Quiz Part IV

 

Like some housewives, monastic priests, seekers after truth, a few gurus, magicians, and mystics, you seek to “join yourself to God.” What is most likely to occur in the near future?

 

Nothing, absolutely nothing.  When I said “I wish to be one with God” what I meant was that saying those words gives me a nice warm feeling in my heart.  I have absolutely no intention of backing up my words with actions.  That is, I have no plan of action.”  (“But maybe God will guide my life now that I said something nice to flatter Him.”)

 

Some demon shows up who monitors vows that are spoken aloud concerning uniting with God.  This devil is like a troll under a bridge—he wants to know if you are ready to pay your dues for crossing over.  “What dues?” you ask.  He replies, “Well,” he says, “There is a little infinite abyss that separates the material universe from the Presence of God. (After all, God the Creator stands slightly outside of the created universe). And since many sojourners get lost when they journey out into the abyss seeking God, its my job to mount a search and rescue operation.  So you can pay now or later when I rescue your sorry ass.”  “What do you charge?” you ask.  The devil replies, “To bring you back to the material worlds, I inject you with an antidote which I have found quickly cures those who are spiritually off course--a little Conquistador greed, some of the hatred and arrogance the narrow-minded heed, a taste of lust upon which we demons feed, and the ‘right beliefs” of the self-righteous whose doctrines are the product of our seed.”

 

You decide the best way to unite with God is to honor the Sabbath to keep it holy.  You may or may not do any work on the Sabbath.  But you understand that the principle is quite simple—to set aside a time each week in which God is the primary focus.  But since you are not a complete idiot, fool, or given over to absolute stupidity, you understand that the basic principle means that during this time set aside each week you are to love God “with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.”  Consequently as any lover who seeks to love his Beloved, you experiment in a passive devotional invocation approach (that is, you work with your feelings) and you experiment with an active intense focus of your trained mind and will approach (that is, you work with the full power of your mind and the divine will that is within you) to unite with the other’s body, mind, and heart. (In other words, you spare nothing and hold nothing back). After thirty years of this setting time aside, you discover God is quite willing to talk to you with no less intimacy and no less power than what he shared with any of His prophets such as Isaiah, Ezekiel, Elijah, and Daniel (and just so you understand what I am saying, add Moses to this list, for God seeks many men like Moses to appear in every century to serve His purposes.)

[He just doesn’t use the standard burning bush to make His pitch.  These days He expects a little more self-initiative.]

 

This is nonsense.  There is no need for magical training, prophetic depth, or mystical bullshit.  You accept Christ into your heart and you are now united with God.  Got it!  It is that simple. 

     Now then, let me be the first to congratulate you on joining the Republican Party and escaping from the clutches of those godless, heathen Democrats. I mean if you have accepted Christ into your heart it should be perfectly clear to you that you are now in favor of the death penalty, against gun control, against abortion and sex education, for reducing taxes, for intelligent design, for the displays of Christmas and the ten commandments on public property, and any other aspects of the Republican party platform—I mean, this nation was founded on Evangelical Christianity and what can be more obvious than that God stands squarely behind us?

 

Stop being so cynical.  Any person of any faith or persuasion even a non believer who prays to God with sincerity and even faith as small as a grain of seed is in fact united with God in that moment of prayer.  God is everywhere and He is surely within the heart of those who open to Him in need, in trust, in love, or even in making a simple request for His blessing or guidance.  This is not a mystical thing.  We are all God’s children and He is within us whether we know it or not in every moment, every breath, every tear, and every heartbeat.

 

Be one with God? Let me think about that.  Oh, the only obvious thing here is that you have to first learn to be completely and totally one with another human being before you will ever comprehend in the smallest degree the challenge and commitment and patience and love necessary to unite with God.  But you know, my girlfriend is absolutely impossible.  The emotional pain of intimacy with her, even trying to deal with her, is unbearable.  She is constantly disrespectful and attempting to destroy who I am.  Opps, isn’t  akasha even worse, more  than any lover, it seeks to obliterate any identification with form, self-image, or personal needs and history.  I guess God will just have to wait on this one until that place in space and time when I attain to true love.  Maybe God made women so difficult that in learning to love them I would be better prepared to endure the beauty of His face, well, of His/Her face.  Maybe the woman is a small taste of oneness with God and God in return encourages us to attain a greater will and a greater love.  Or, as the saying goes, maybe “God is love, lover, and beloved.”  The task in seeing the world through God’s eyes is equally and in the same moment to see it through the eyes of our lover.

 

And now for a completely different perspective, i.e., from the undine Istiphul: 

 

The magician opens the gates to the inner planes in another way.  He casts his magic circle consecrating it with water.  He draws pentagrams and sigils on the circumference like an artist whose paintbrush leaves a trail of fire.  His eyes sparkle with divine authority.  His voice resonates with a sacred ferocity as he chants great and mighty words of power.  Standing at the center of the circle, he joins himself with God so that what he wills might be fulfilled, that no obstacle can long resist what he commands to manifest.    

    But at Istiphul’s touch, with her clairvoyance

awakening within my eyes, I sense it is lovers who have the greater power and an authority that has no limit.  To be in Istiphul’s presence is to be anointed with the beauty of the world.  And the love she celebrates evokes a greater mystery than that of a mage joined with God.

At the touch of her hand on mine, skin against skin, our different evolutions, our separate destinies, the barriers human and divine are set aside so two hearts can find each other, blend, merge, and unite.  In this circle, only love exists and all power and will bow down before its bliss--such is the vision hidden within women and within the soul of the sea.

 

 

 

Some magical groups talk about a Gevurah or sphere of Mars initiation.  One of the best descriptions of a spiritual warrior is given not by Chogyum Trumpa who drank himself to death but by Don Juan in the writings of Carlos Castaneda.  Which one of the following was not described in Castaneda’s writings?

 

A warrior is impeccable, that is, he exerts control over himself and seeks to fulfill a specific purpose in every situation he enters and at all times.

 

A warrior knows how to “stop the world.”  He is capable at any time of turning off his ordinary mind and the activities of his normal consciousness and enter a state of pure perception that is beyond all presumptions, assumptions, and conceptions.

 

A warrior is always vigilant, on guard, assumes nothing, and takes nothing for granted.

 

A warrior’s supreme attainment is viewing other human beings with detachment—he can see beyond his need, desire, or vulnerability and look at others as if they were a Gila Monster crossing a road or an eagle landing on a branch.

 

A warrior uses his own death as an advisor.

 

A warrior masters his daily routines and habits treating them as critical areas of his study like a hunter studies the habits and routines of his prey in order to perform a successful hunt.

 

A warrior can change his personality at will going for example from quiet introvert to radiant, outgoing extrovert, from intelligent, detached, and curious to forceful, leading, and commanding, from fun, playful, intimate, sensual, and sweet to single minded warrior focused totally on accomplishing his mission.

 

A warrior is constantly and forever exploring paths of beauty that honor the unfathomable wonder and awesome mystery of the universe that surrounds us.

 

A warrior is ever vigilant to see and then seize that rare moment or window of opportunity in which power or the unknown appears to him.

 

A warrior will set aside six months or even years to disguise himself, playing a role, or changing jobs to discover if he can share his innermost inspiration and power with another human being who shows unusual potential.

 

A warrior never whines, complains, or blames others for anything, that is, you are not a warrior and not of the Gevurah Initiation if from out of your mouth proceeds an emotional utterance that is whining, complaining, or blaming.  A warrior is in fact never helpless or vulnerable—every moment is an opportunity to move to your own place of power.

 

A warrior can be impeccable, in control, and in his place of power except when it comes to woman—for the love of a beautiful woman in fact contains the power to annihilate everything that is masculine by taking it to a place of greater love and union.

 

Women in fact have a greater natural potential for entering the spiritual world than do men.

 

 

Which are stories a magician might tell to impress his friends?

 

Well, there was this hurricane coming my way and though I don’t ever do weather control, for some reason I sat down and meditated on this hurricane for twenty minutes.  The next news report indicated that the hurricane had stopped dead in the water for an hour and then made a ninety degree turn veering off course and heading due north away from us.

 

So I am out there in the forest chanting some old dumb Buddhist chant and these two young deer come and sit down next to me.  I pet them and after a while I start jogging through the forest and they run along beside me.  Except when I go back to my car.  They turn around and walk off when I opened the car door.  I guess they figured at that point I had been fooling them and wasn’t really a deer after all.

 

So I was meditating with this women, I mean, in a very pure way with honest spiritual intentions.  We did this once a week together.  But I could feel her having an orgasm as we meditated even though she was thousands of miles away.  She later on confirmed this and implied she liked the turn the meditation was taking. What can I say?  Meditations sometimes go astray and in this case she was the one who took it in the wrong way.

 

So this spirit gives me this Muse who flies between the stars and I ended up writing poetry every day.  It was actually exhausting until I sent the Muse away to return when I was stronger and had more leisure. 

 

Yah, whenever I go sit in a church pew, there is this angel who haunts my family ancestors who shows up and sits in the pew behind me.  Like one of the angels who assisted Moses, it whispers in my ear, “Of all those who dwell on earth only a very few of you have ears that are open and can hear my voice speak.  And so perhaps there is some miracle you would like accomplished?  A Red Sea divided, a pillar of fire by night or a cloud by day?  Don’t be shy.  For I stand ever ready to serve and to manifest the glory of God on earth.”

 

Oh about every year or so I have a dream in which I wake up and I am in the future.  Last time I was in a car in the dream and the whole car flew through the air into the future.  I always try to remember everything I see going on in these dreams because later on when I older what I saw is what comes to be.

 

No, I only did a brief meditation on the Chinese premier I saw on TV, you know, maybe get him to work a little more on democracy.  And the very next day on the news the Chinese premier said, “We in China are committed to democracy.”  But a week later after my little spell had started to wear off, the premier said during another TV interview that “When I use the word democracy, I mean we will define democracy in our own way.”  In other words, spells can be good but you have to keep charging them up otherwise their influence wears off.

 

My favorite undine?  Istiphul—she is the most beautiful creature on earth.  She is very magical and erotic and I said to myself when I first met her that “I will never meet a human woman this beautiful.”  But you know, life is full of surprises.

 

What?  Magicians don’t tell stories to impress their friends.  Magicians are beyond vanity and have no need to open up and share spontaneously stories about their lives with anyone.

 

What?  What?  Don’t you know that biography is fiction and autobiography is pure fantasy.  Now how many times do I have to say that. 

 

 

Sometimes magicians have very brief telepathic contact with spirits.  Even so, a single telepathic impression can contain volumes of information, new skills, abilities, powers, inspiration, etc.  And it sometimes takes years to read through these volumes or find a practical application.  Which of the following may occur after such a brief contact with an earthzone spirit?

 

After thinking about an earthzone spirit (in Libra I think) who might help you develop healing remedies and herbal elixirs and while lying down getting acupuncture you “download” a plan of action for developing micro brewing and after succeeding at this you end up with enough cash to finance your spiritual journeys during the rest of your life.

 

After consulting with a spirit in Libra of the Earthzone who specializes in laughter and humor, you become a stand up comedian—that is, you now have a funny and engaging way of reframing all that hatred and rage you have inside and making others laugh as you share.

 

After briefly meditating on a spirit of the earthzone who is a master of fire, you walk around your neighborhood melting the snow on others’ roof just for fun.

 

After consulting with a spirit of the earthzone who specializes in divination, you end up with an annual income of $75,000 from doing Tarot readings.

 

You consult with Ubarim in Taurus in the earthzone who inspires you to write an entire mythology about a kingdom named after him.  In the process, three women you never met email you and tell you they “would die for you” because of your writing and a few other women actually think about killing you in order to “purge themselves” of their obsession with you. (All of this in spite of being one of the most unlucky people when it comes to love.)

 

After using a little horse shoe magnet electro magnetic volt placed in the akasha to discover a suitable divine mission, you receive a vision regarding a future problem facing mankind.  But you also discover others who have had this same specific vision.  One of these people is in an insane asylum and another is a drug addict.  But this does not stop you.  For you, the lights are all green and say “Go for it.”

 

After consulting with a spirit of Cancer in the earthzone who specializes in the magic taught in ancient and forgotten civilizations, you find yourself in the presence of individuals who have found extremely powerful magical relics from ancient and forgotten civilizations. So naturally you decide to activate one or more of them.

 

After a brief contact with Istiphul you notice that you can read the charkas and karma of whoever sat in chair before you when you sit down.

 

 

After you explain about how some people like General Patton, Franz Bardon, Einstein, Bill Gates, etc. enter life to fulfill one specific mission, she asks you if everyone has a specific purpose to fulfill in life.  Your best response:

 

I think in the movie La Strada a man picks up a pebble on a beach and says, “If this one pebble has no meaning then the entire universe has no meaning.  If this pebble does have meaning, then everything in the universe has meaning.”  Well, if you are going to put it that way sure everyone has a specific purpose to fulfill otherwise the contrary is too horrible to consider.  Now, you have heard about the butterfly effect, have you heard about the pebble effect?

 

Someone once said to the universe, “I have meaning.” And the universe replied, “Though that may be the case it does not obligate me to reveal what that meaning is to you or to assist you in pursuing it.”

 

Look, keep it simple: if you are born an Aries then you obviously are here to learn to assert yourself and to solve problems, accept personal challenges and overcome obstacles in your own way.  When you become mature, you do this for other people.  Same with all the signs, for example, a Leo is here to learn to develop a personal sense of honor and dignity, to reinforce morality, to lead and inspire, and be the center of a community.  And when a Leo becomes mature he or she empowers others to shine and does this without having to be paid with loyalty, affection, and attention as part of the transaction.

 

We are all here to learn to master the three lower planes—the physical, astral, and mental.  We sometimes are placed under great restrictions and limitations precisely so we can learn to take charge of ourselves and our environment, change the world, and attain freedom.  For most people, dealing with physical necessities, emotional satisfactions, and developing mental focus and clarity are more than enough challenge.  In other words, your task is to find meaningful work, personal love, and a niche or community where you can belong and feel and be of value to others.

 

“The only reason for entering life is to be of service to others.” (He’ad’ra from the screenplay, Fall of Atlantis).  Some people have hidden within them an abundance of capacity for dealing with necessities, being satisfied, and focusing with clarity.  Their mission, should they accept it, is to deal with the physical necessities, deepest satisfactions in life, and greatest wisdom and clarity not only for themselves but for communities, nations, and even the entire world.  Of course, they can always screw up and abuse their gifts or fail to activate them in a positive way or just get distracted by a cute skirt or motorcycle boots that walk by. 

 

Yes, everyone has a specific purpose.  Edgar Cayce used to channel past lives so as to convince individuals of how masterful  and wondrous their activities were in other lives so that now  they can move on and deal with the fact that their present purpose is just learning how to pay their bills, do a little community service, and care for their friends and family.  I mean, come on, clean up the things you can now touch around yourself before you go racing off into the mystical fairyland of imaginary illusions which some call metaphysics and magical practice.

 

Yes, everyone has a purpose.  Just keep bugging your Holy Guardian Angel through prayer or meditation or magical ritual until you obtain a vision of what specifically you are meant to accomplish.  And then be advised that having a vision in no way grants you knowledge of the means for manifesting that vision.  And receiving a vision in the first place is often like a newspaper reporter writing a story after carefully interviewing you: the guy should receive a Pulitzer prize if he gets your story 75% accurate.  A really great story is usually no more than 45% accurate.  That is, it takes lot of different independent sources and reporters to come up with the truth.  In other words, you may have to become a different human being than who you are now before you can even begin to understand your specific purpose. 

 

Yes, everyone has a purpose.  Just ask yourself what is in your heart.

 

Yes, everyone has a specific purpose. Just follow your bliss.

 

Well, not exactly.  Following your bliss may get you dead or in jail (I know people who did precisely that) and doing what is in your heart may mean hating, abusing, destroying, and annihilating anyone who blocks your path (I know these folks too)—think about that!

 

Just ask your minister, priest, Rabbi, or guru for your specific purpose to fulfill.  Each of these has a little notebook in their hip pocket filled with quick and easy answers that they have perfected and developed over thousands of years.  After considering your gender, income, wealth, age, and personality traits, and of course their own institutional needs, they will be able to tell you exactly what your purpose is.  And also they have a blue book in their other hip pocket which lists the trade in value of your car.  And they can tell you an insurance premium for your age and health, interest per cent for loans, and maximum apartment rental payment given your credit rating. 

 

Well, of course, there are those around who know the answer to all your questions, the solution to all your problems, and your specific and exact divine purpose for being here on earth.  The problem is there might be a little discovery process involved and your freedom of choice just might play a large part.  (As in “What part have you chosen to play in the unfolding of creation?” God asks to entire species on different planets throughout the universe.  From Mystical Fables, Chapter One, The Story of Creation.)

 

Now lets see, that Tarot card reader who downloaded a spirit of divination begins laying out Tarot cards in a certain position to answer your question, “This card represents you.  And this card is what opposes you.  The next card is your path in life.  And this card that goes across it is the obstacle that stands in your way.  And the ‘specific purpose you are here to fulfill’ is represented by this next card ….” (And if you don’t like these answers you can come back tomorrow and the cards will lay out in a different pattern.)

 

 

A woman who successfully projects her mind inside of a man so that she can understand his mind, emotions, and body based on first hand experience most likely will notice which?

 

That he can not find meaning in life by getting pregnant and having a baby nor find the love he has always sought by having a daughter whereas some women can and do.

 

That being and feeling natural is not natural for him.

 

That he can only derive meaning from doing, attaining, or accomplishing something.

 

That the sun in its heat and radiant energy is present in miniature in his body even if he unaware of it, which explains why some men are “driven.”

 

That he is only totally “in” his body during sex, sports, hard work, or physical action.

 

That he likes to do one thing at a time because in this way he “feels” he is accomplishing is mission—to project something of himself outward that seizes and transforms the world.

 

That he only feels fully alive when he “makes” things happen spontaneously.

 

That a man is certain and “knows” something is right because that is what he wants and needs it to be.

 

A man can tell when he has a good women because she is not selfish, that is, she gives of herself without trying to bend him to her will.  She may try to persuade him but not by using sex as a weapon.

 

A man feels in a woman’s body a cool energy like an underground stream that flows, let’s go, nurtures the soul, and heals without any action perceived or seen.  Her body has the power of water that absorbs energy into itself, stores it, and transforms it and returns it continuously.  Of course, like an undertow or rip tide, it can drag down and drown or else quench the thirst and renew, rejuvenate, and grant new life.

 

For a millisecond, a man can experience the bliss of an orgasm just by looking on a woman. 

 

A man naturally thinks about how to solve any problem and feels uncomfortable when there is no course of action.

 

The scent of a woman makes a man feel alive and energized.

 

A woman who successfully, I mean really successfully projects her mind inside of a man no longer hates men.  Why? Because she can perceive things from the other side.

 

 

A man who successfully projects his mind inside of a woman so that he can understand her mind, emotions, and body based on first hand experience most likely will notice which?

 

That her body, emotions, and mind are always giving and receiving in everything she does. 

 

A woman can tell when she has a good man because he strives to be stable, fair, and consistent. 

 

That a woman only feels fully alive when things happen spontaneously. 

 

A woman is certain and “knows” something is right because that is the way it is supposed to be.

 

A woman feels in a man’s body a light and heat that excite, ignite, and seek to bring the best out of life.  It has the power of fire that constantly is seeking a fuel it can burn in order to gather, sustain, and focus its power.  Of course, it can destroy and devour or radiate light and create.

 

A woman thinks about talking about a problem without having to solve it or do anything about it.

 

The scent of a man’s sweat makes a woman feel relaxed and calm.

 

A man notices that a woman’s brain can experience pure physical being, that is pleasure, without having to attach any imagery, fantasy, or power to it.

 

That a woman can multitask:  that she enjoys pursuing several activities and is comfortable moving between them even with interruptions and distractions.

 

That a woman thinks in emotions—the nature, strength, and quality of the bond she feels to others or to a topic influences the way she relates to it. 

 

That a number of small fulfillments in life can easily add up to being more than one great fulfillment.

 

She can feel that a strong relationship with a sister, daughter, or mother is one of the most fulfilling things in life.  (But if anything, having a daughter is often enough to justify her being alive.)

 

Once his mind is inside a woman’s body, he feels that the universe in its all-embracing, all-encompassing presence is living inside of her whether she is aware of it or not.

 

A man who successfully, I mean really successfully projects his consciousness inside a woman suddenly realizes that every woman is like a mother, daughter, sister, child, and guardian angel—someone to be honored and respected.  That is, for the first time in his life he actually experiences a woman without thinking in terms of sex, sex roles, or erotic intent

 

 

A “silent spectator or observer” is

 

This is a practice in which you stand back and watch your own thoughts from a distance while not participating.

 

A silent spectator is someone at a sporting event who is unhappy that his side losing but he doesn’t want to be a bad sportsman by complaining or booing.  Or perhaps a silent spectator is an extreme introvert who charges his energy up while sitting on the sidelines.

 

A silent observer is like a medical researcher wearing white in front of a microscope or an astronomer wearing ordinary clothes though warm clothes at fifteen thousand feet in front of a telescope.  Neither wants to disturb what is being observed by interfering with the accuracy of the perceptual transmission.

 

The silent spectator is the one transcendental ego that no sword can pierce, no fire burn, no water drown, etc.  It is the true self, utterly independent of the world and beyond all suffering.  Now, let me see, to get this you just need to join Shiva with Shakti who has ascended through your spine into your brain and allow time, space, the universe, all opposites, etc. to be annihilated. 

 

No, the silent spectator is consciousness itself, that is, the deeper consciousness free of contamination from the elements.  It is the mind that is open, luminous, self-aware, and empty of all form like a mirror.  Some say this mirror or emptiness is already within each of us and some say you have to develop it but the discussion is irrelevant since the same process is required for “activating” it.

 

No, “the mind is as vast as the sky, as deep as the ocean, as solid as a mountain, and flexible like chewing gum.” (Shalpa Rinpoche).  You develop this through a practice called shinye in Tibetan Buddhism as compared to Vipassana in Theravada Buddhism.  Vipassana is more like putting your mind inside a closet—it is neither open nor vast but good for hanging specific things on hangers.

 

No, it is easier to practice by simply gazing upon the blue sky.  Thoughts and sensations in your body and disturbances in your awareness are like little clouds, well, maybe an occasional thunderstorm or hurricane but the open and clear blue sky is still there behind it all.

 

The silent observer is a construct, an imagined or realized state of awareness in which you eventually can stop all thoughts in your mind and simply be aware.  You practice it until in your own way you can shift into it whenever you want.

 

The silent observer is like learning to ride a bicycle.  Even though some Zen masters say you can not stop the mind from thinking, people who say that do not bring the full power of will to their practice.  Once you get it, like riding a bicycle, you never forget it.  But then again, if you try to move from a bicycle to a Hardly Davidson or race bicycles in a French long distance race--that will take a lot more practice. 

 

If you can stop all thoughts in your mind for a half hour or hour or, hey, even for ten minutes, you are existing at least on a mental level like a spirit of the earthzone.  There are now five thousand different powers and qualities of consciousness you can discover within this silence of mind.  Like what?  Well, let’s see.  In the sphere of Mars silence can be used to destroy anything.  In the sphere of Venus, a silent space of oneness is used for joining totally to another in love.  In the sphere of the sun, silence is the empty mirror so clear, pure, and open that the Presence of God can appear within it shining forth with an absolutely original creative light.  Within the sphere of the moon, silence is timelessness—past, present, and future are open to your gaze for you can now perceive how all unfolding causes arise and are fulfilled and that the separation that seems to exist in time is an illusion.  In Mercury, silence enables the will of God to gather in strength within your self until the divine purpose manifests on earth. Does the silent observer inside of you right now know all of this?  Yes, absolutely.  All of the above is present and arises in accordance to the way you shape your silence and focus your observing.  Although don’t try to observe this at a Quaker meeting on Sunday when they sit in silence.  Their “silence” is like coal mixed with shale, bread mixed with stones, or a prayer meeting where someone has left the radio on tuned into Howard Stern.  There is too much selfishness and ego present so their rating never gets beyond “amateur” status.

 

On the other hand, if you want to cheat at any time, you jump ahead and practice akashic mediation.  Then in a state of akasha thoughts themselves dissolve instantly at the moment when they try to appear. 

 

There are other ways of cheating.  Project your mind inside a Zen master’s mind, the Dalai lama’s mind, or better still, the sylph Cargoste.  Cargoste’s mind is the perfection of Dzogchen—without thought or image he is aware of the entire biosphere of the earth with all its interactions.  Now that is a mind that is clear.

 

The silent spectator is more like the director or producer watching an actor putting on his clothes, entering the stage, and playing a certain role in a stage play.  Ah, but standing right next to this director/producer is Mr. obsession, Mr. fascination, Mr. addiction, Mr. “I have been hiding in your closet waiting to come out for your entire life,” and numerous other characters.  If the director/producer decides to take a break, one of these other characters is always happy to take over and take the play in a new direction or start a new production.

 

 

Pop Quiz Part V

 

Mental Wandering is

 

       Mental wandering is “wandering around with your mind.” 

Closely associated with Attention Deficit Disorder as defined by the National Psychiatric Association, mental wandering arises due to a weakness in brain chemistry.  Specifically, the synapses are firing without respect for proper order and harmony; like someone cutting into a line, everyone ends up dissatisfied.  So keep your thoughts, impressions, and perceptions properly aligned and if distractions occur?  Well, what do you do?  Like someone cutting into a line, “give them a piece of your mind.” (Quote provided by the Official Handbook of Psychiatric Disorders which is ghost written by the Ladies for Proper Social Etiquette.)

 

The mind is a terrible thing to waste.  So don’t go wandering around.  Keep your feet on solid ground.  This is sound advice--a word to the wise will suffice.

 

Mental wandering is a method of projecting one’s mind directly into the realm of the elementals, earthzone, or higher spheres.  No ritual or magical paraphernalia are required.  It may help to saturate your mind wit the vibration (light, elemental quality, etc.) of the domain where you are sending your mind.  Contact with spirits is then made through casual encounter or through throwing in a name, a sigil, etc.

 

Mental wandering is an advanced form of daydreaming.  Actually magical daydreaming can be accomplished through free association in combination with magical intent and a trained receptivity.  You just think of a spirit and then allow your magically trained subconscious to interact with the spirit in an effortless manner.

 

Mental wandering occurs when the mind wanders into “higher” or “lower” spheres of evolution, past, future, etc.  Dramatists, screenplay writers, and occult writers are particularly gifted in this sort of thing.

 

Mental wandering is for those magicians who do not like going to the bother of doing evocation.  You just interact directly with a spirit without all the clumsy bother of using ritual, kind of like making a new acquaintance or taking up a conversation where you left off with an old friend.

 

Mental wandering should be distinguished from astral travel.  Astral travel involves pulling out one’s astral body or some say one’s etheric body.  It is said that traveling with the astral body beyond the boundaries of the earthzone with its elemental protective sphere will result in the death of the magician.  Therefore, make sure you always have your spiritual passport in order and the correct akashic visas issued for your spiritual explorations otherwise you may end up in a Saturnian jail.

 

There is no limit on where the mind can go, what it can project into or join with.  There is no limit on what it can observe or understand from assuming an objective external, an empathic internal, or both modes of observation simultaneously.  Just remember, it is the always the heart that  runs the search program.

 

 

Swami Rama states that when he received shaktipat from his master he remained in a state of ecstasy for nine hours.  I sent a telepathic request to Swami Rama to experience briefly his experience and he sent me a shaktipat that lasted nine minutes (well, I use the word “brief.”)  This was a state of bliss which is like having the perfect opposite of my self alive inside me so I am one with her.  Swami used to enter into this state of oneness each night before going to bed for the rest of his life.  What might this form of inner union signify in terms of masculine spiritual or magical development?

 

Come on.  Any red blooded male wants to get it on with or get some from a woman for reasons of mental and physical health and emotional gratification.  And you know, those Swami’s are known for being horny esp. when they get around young, Western women, also known as spiritual groupies.  You can’t use gurus as a model for spiritual behavior.  Well, not unless your particular obsessive compulsive disorder is burning incense, living in an ashram, wearing funny robes, and chanting.  And then there is that little schedule scheme of monastic chores such as cooking, cleaning the floors, and wiping up the spiritual bullshit of your fellow practitioners.

 

You know, Swami Rama might have had this feminine presence within himself as did his master.  But I kind of wonder who started it?  Was a woman the original lineage master and so she passed her essence down by shaktipat to her male disciples?  If so, the male master must be initiated by a female master.  How about that?

 

Or was it that a male yogi practiced sexual/tantric yoga with a female disciple?  By doing this, the two united their chakras as one.  Thus the male learned through direct experience how to embody in himself the essence of a woman.  Thus any male magician can learn to embody within himself the feminine essence by working closely with a female magician through tantric or magical sexual practices.

 

Or perhaps the yogic lineage was founded when a male yogi united with and then absorbed the woman’s soul into himself, taking her essence without a fair trade in return.  Haven’t you heard what happens when the Buddhist lama sits the women in the back of the temple during puga or a female notices that the Taoist sexual yoga actually only benefits the men?  Its called outrage.  Even women in Islam are starting to object to sitting in the back of the temple.  And Swami Rama’s one true love, who he refused to marry, insisted he pursue a political career which he also refused to do.  I tell you, what used to pass as “spiritual” is now called inequality, exploitation, and a bad career choice in our age.

 

Ok, let’s keep it simple.  How can a man and a woman give to each other to the extent that they actually taste, share, fully experience, and learn to embody the essence of the other’s gender?  This would include the mysteries of the other’s spirit and also the goal of teaching each other the mastery of the electric and magnetic fluids?  (Would you believe it? A woman actually asked me the above question.  At most about six women email me during a year from visiting my website). Stay tuned.  This question no doubt requires a separate essay—see Problems in the Study of Magic, Part III.)

 

Hey, Swami practiced yoga. Yoga is union.  Just do yoga.  Your own body and breath have the answers to all your questions.

 

Anyone who pursues these questions is obviously obsessed with sex and women.  In fact, this whole line of thought is the product of a complete nerd, a geek.   Not.  They are obsessed with the creativity that comes from joining masculine and feminine whether within oneself or in a relationship.  Notice the difference?

 

Duh.  A magician must master both the electric and magnetic fluids equally if he is going to create using magic (Bardon). What he does with his personal life is his own business.

 

No, a magician’s personal life is his highest art and best arena of magical practice.  And every man and woman has something they can teach or give to the other should they have the opportunity and recognize the possibility.

You are personifying Swami Rama’s skatipat and expressing it as a “woman.”  What Swami learned to embody in himself was not a woman but the biochemical, spiritual, and psychological experience any man can experience in the instant after he has an orgasm.  This is that great moment of drama when his physiology switches from the parasympathetic to the sympathetic system of responses. 

Special thanks to the increasing number of young career oriented women who have dedicated their lives to mastering the masculine electric fluid and due to increasing number of complaints from young male magicians that women are no longer very feminine--the Magicians’ Guild is proud to announce the release of a new herbal remedy.  This elixir is called the Moment After Orgasm (also considered an effective herbal treatment for getting in touch with your inner woman).  Complete contentment and the perfection of serenity are guaranteed lasting for nine hours (enough to get a good night’s sleep without a feminine woman by your side.) It is offered completely free of charge at any Guild Supply Outlet for those who are current in their Magicians’ Guild dues.

 

Not.  You miss the magical aspect.  Swami Rama’s inner woman is a spiritually living being made from out of his own vitality.  And like any spirit dwelling in akasha, Swami Rama simply switches into a feminine aspect of himself since any adept on a high level is inherently androgynous.  (This explains why there is “no marriage or giving and receiving of marriage” in heaven.  They are all androgynous.)  (“You mean the rest of the galaxy are perverts?” from Left Hand of Darkness.)

 

Gees.  All this talk about the inner woman.  Someone needs to get laid.

 

We here at of the privately funded Institute for Guru Success would like to suggest that the phrase, “get laid,” is inappropriate for a topic involving a high level of inspiration.  We don’t mind you blasting gurus, making fun of them, and describing their motives and actions with absolute cynicism—hey, publicity is free advertising; it is worth money even when it is unfavorable as long as it is correctly handled by an effective public relations firm.  But really, “get laid” as a phrase suggests something unseemly is going on. 

     As an alternative, may we suggest this: “Although we are discussing the “inner woman” we are not describing anything directly analogous to real women.  Some individuals will in fact require a healthy and intimate relationship with a woman depending on their karmic situation. 

    “The “inner woman” is then more appropriately used in the description of an internal spiritual process.  This process is in fact going on within everyone.  Only a very small part of our relationships to the opposite gender can be recaptured and applied to illuminate what is in essence a divine image and state of consciousness found within us.”

    Now isn’t this way of saying it a whole lot more informative and fairer to the fairer sex?

 

Which of the following would be consequences of a nuclear bomb going off in LA, New York, London, or Paris?

 

Civil liberties would be set back fifty years.

 

Students would need a security clearance in order to attend college.

 

A secret security agency approved by the leading fifteen nations code named Global Security would be founded which would report only to the permanent members of the Security Council of the UN.

 

Due to restrictions on travel, communication, freedom of the press, and so forth, education and technological innovation would be set back fifty years.

 

There would be massive numbers of black ops involving world wide assassinations and indefinite holding periods of suspects.

 

House to house searches would become common and all internet and cell phone communications would be closely monitored.

 

All democracies would be in a permanent state of emergency and each head of state would possess authority to declare martial law with minimum pretext.

 

An identification and location system involving global positioning satellites would be put into effect for the entire planet’s population.  Each person’s location would be continuously recorded.

 

Millions of sincere religious practitioners, except of course the radicals in Islam (and Pat Robertson and Jerry Farwell who would say on air—“Its God’s judgment for our sins.”) would ask, “How could God let this happen?”  The answer:  God didn’t fund the Manhattan Project and God gave millions of people the ability to foresee and to prevent it.  They just didn’t bother doing what needed to be done.  (Or as Teddy Kennedy once said, Nuclear war is “unthinkable.”  Duh! I guess someone was thinking about it after all.)

 

Which one of the following spelled the beginning of the end for communism in the Soviet Union?

 

When Karl Marx cried because the discovery of gold in California meant that the U.S. had found a new source of exploitation to sustain its imperialism.

 

When the head of the communist party in the 1930’s in the U.S. writes Stalin and complains that Roosevelt’s New Deal (in which Roosevelt reinvents the role of Robin Hood) is legally stealing from the rich to give to the poor in order to prevent a proletarian revolution.

 

In 1949 when John Nash published his graduate thesis at Princeton in which he demonstrated that conflicting parties, such as labor and management, always have the option of resolving their problems in a non-violent manner.

 

When Marcuse (after receiving his a royalty check for his first book) complains in the 1960’s that the U.S. is utilizing “repressive desublimation” to co-opt its opponents, rewarding them for their critiques in a way that inadvertently makes them de facto capitalists.  I mean, there are no rich communists and if there are, as is now occurring in China, their children will look at their fathers as complete idiots.

 

It began when the CIA orchestrated the sale of Che Guevara t-shirts to help pay for its clandestine activities.

 

When Radio Free America began broadcasting commercials on Russian airwaves for Coca Cola, Ketchup, and lingerie from Victoria’s Secret Garden.

 

When the stocks for Exxon, GE, and Dow Chemical started showing up in the retirement funds for firemen, nurses, mechanics, and Walmart employees.

 

Communism, like any other ideological system such as socialism, capitalism, fascism, and feminism is based on a hardened complex of interlocking mental ideas.  To succeed, these systems must hypnotize their adherents’ emotions on the astral plane and severely restrict freedom of action on the physical plane.  In other words, the mental ideas are ferociously jealous and require that others “think, feel, and act” the way they do.  This hypnotic power eventually erodes and collapses under the weight of its own narrow understanding of life.  Communism collapsed when a large part of its citizens became alcoholics and its economy stagnant.

 

What might you learn by projecting your mind into other people?

 

That President Reagan was so persuasive because he was a natural born telepath.  The news media missed this and were astonished that such an obviously dumb president could be so successful.

 

That Andropov, a former head of the KGB, was an embodiment of pure malice and extremely clever.

 

That Marilyn Monroe was also telepathic and designed her physical and emotional interactions in response to her perception of male desire.

 

That Bill Gates is clairvoyant, having part of his consciousness located about two years in the future.  It is not that he is brighter than other CEOs.  Rather, he is more competitive making the decisions that block others’ success.

 

That Saddham Hussein’s positive mission was to unite all the Arab countries into the equivalent of a Common Market for Islam.  But instead he chose to become an agent for the dark side.  This agenda, for unknown reasons, was stymied even though he had more will power than Hitler.

 

That Vaipahee, the former prime minister of India, had decided to attack Pakistan even though it might lead to a nuclear war resulting in millions dead.  (The CIA missed this one.)

 

That Swami Kriyananda had mastered the equivalent of several salamanders though yoga practice.  His heart chakra embodied a marvelous sea of fire radiant with life and energy.

 

That Swami Rama’s life mission involved stabilizing India politically but instead he became hopelessly addicted to the practice of yoga of which he was a supreme master. 

 

That Steven Hawkin has a holographic image of the universe inside of his mind.

 

That the Dalai Lama’s heart chakra is a “sea of compassion” nearly infinite and the basis of a genuine cosmic religion.

 

That the historic Buddha was extremely empathic and also a master of life force, things his disciples have completely ignored down through the ages.

 

 

When someone dies

 

They are pretty much the same although the level of energy they possess drops by about 90%.  This also causes them to lose touch with physical time so that a few minutes for them may be months or years in the real world.

 

Their five senses no longer have a physical counterpart so that now they perceive on the astral plane instead of within the physical world.

 

They often do not know or refuse to believe that they are dead.  This may result in elaborate visualizations that perpetuate the fiction that they are still alive.  (See the movie Jacob’s Ladder  for a close approximation.)

 

A “greeter” comes to meet them, often a member of their family who has previously died and who seeks to guide them to their next realm.

 

They sometimes appear just after death before someone who has the second sight” in order to say a few last words.

 

They enter the Bardo state where they choose between five different colors representing five distinct Buddha realms or five states of suffering.  Their choice then determines their fate.  (But this only applies if they have previously attended Buddhist catechism as a child.)

 

Their consciousness moves to that state of density and illumination in the planet’s astral plane which is suitable for their level of maturity, that is, they finally find a “niche” which they may not have found in life.

 

95% of those about to die have psychic visions of their “greeters,” of their mode of departure (as a bus, airplane, ship that is coming to pick them up at the moment of death) and often want to complete any “unfinished business” such as packing a suitcase or saying goodbye to some loved one.

 

A few, though declared dead, get sent back because it is “not their time.”  They may also receive a vision or be given a choice as to whether they wish to return. (See the movie, Heaven Can Wait, or individuals such as Ray Elkins who says he was sent back by Christ). 

 

Faith (not belief in something but the quality and power of conviction that you can unite with truth [and light] and express it through action) is the single most important trait to possess for adapting to and succeeding in any afterlife situation. (Cermiel—an earthzone spirit.)  (see Q. “Should I be afraid?” A. “Not a man like you.” Meet Joe Black)

 

They enter the “light” or full presence of their guardian angel who grants both a brief but total life review and a state of all-encompassing love and peace (which they could have entered anytime while still alive had they tried hard enough—Cermiel).

 

When you die, you are dead.  There is nothing more to be said, other than the memories that are left in the brains of those who remain.

 

“When you die, the best parts of yourself are like sparks that fly through the air and become a part of those who are still alive.” (Whoopie Goldberg)

 

 

Practicing Bardon, you may fall victim to various disturbances due to an overdeveloped or out of control mental concentration.  These might include, dissociation from your personality, feeling that you have become a detached spectator, inability to feel natural, to let go, and to flow, and so forth.  To get energy to come down from out of your head you

 

Stop doing so much magic.

 

Stop doing all magic.

 

Stop doing magic during this incarnation.  You did too much in other lives and this lifetime was designed as a rest stop on your long journey to perfection. 

 

You have done too much magic.  To compensate, you have to do the opposite of magic—be physically active; engage in physical work; play sports; climb mountains; do art but avoid magic in art, concentrate on work and love—make money and make love; do things with other parts of your body than your head, namely your hips, legs, and feet.  If all else fails, do “the quick and easy recovery remedy” for mentally disturbed magicians by concentrating for a minute on each of your five senses twice a day.

 

The problem is your self-talk—you are identifying with your own weird way of thinking and are terribly shaken after glancing into  the incomprehensibly vast depths of the human mind (which other people of course do not sense or see). Therefore, put aside your desires for attaining grandeur through magical practice by taking a life long, self-taught class in 1. how to use ordinary language, 2. speak like normal human beings, 3. engage in casual conversation, 4. act normal and friendly, 5. avoid the use of abstractions, esoteric, and metaphysical language altogether, and 6. above all else—learn to be grateful and satisfied with each moment you are alive (which is the single most important requisite for practicing genuine magic).

 

What are possible dangerous side effects from practicing magic?  Part II.

 

As happened to a kundalini yoga instructor, often someone in his apartment complex would literally jump out of a window when he was deep in meditation.

 

After doing love magic, numerous women fall in love with you.  But a few of these women are willing to kill you should you not return their affection.

 

After doing a little wealth magic, very wealthy individuals seek to become your patron.  However, that Arab with all his rolls Royce cars, private jets, and luxury yachts turns out to be an arms dealer and wanted by the IRS; the CEO of a large company who wines and dines you at a luxurious club turns out to want you to do insider trading; and another CEO who lets you in buy in early on a soon to be IPO fails to tell you that his company is already bankrupt.

 

You discover that whenever you do meditations on world peace the head of the nation you are praying for is often assassinated on shortly afterwards.

 

You work in the akasha to remove the pain in another person due to her karmic situation and discover she now hates you furiously for no good reason as if you have stolen part of her soul.

 

That one tiny piece of magic you did to send a hurricane away ended up diverting all major hurricanes from the Pacific to the Atlantic for the next twenty five years.

 

After practicing as a magician, people who know you begin treating you like God’s gatekeeper, as if you can speak on God’s behalf.  But you soon discover that practitioners of magic never want a straight answer from you.  Instead, they are hoping you will verify and confirm the answer they already have decided on whether consciously or subconsciously.  So finally you understand why the Oracle of Delphi was so obscure in its responses—the riddles from the priestess were designed to verify and confirm whatever the petitioner already believed.

 

After doing a little very rare magic for satisfying a personal desire you finally understand the Greek saying, “The gods answer the prayers of those whom they wish to curse.”

 

Religion is

 

A party.  It is a chance for people who would never ever associate to get together, commune, communicate, and celebrate their community.  (See the movie The Apostle.)  Just ignore all that crap about guilt, hell, purgatory, sin, etc.  That is just there to stimulate the adrenal glands—these glands feed on fear and terror.  Since many people are adrenaline junkies, they need a fix once a week to get their kicks. 

     (Marx didn’t quite have it right.  The drug is not opium but epinephrine unless you are into psychology like Freud and then it is cocaine.  Freud, who worked with extremely repressed women, observed that for many “pleasure is pain and pain is pleasure”—a central doctrine of many religions.)

 

Religion is a way to make people feel so important, for example, bribing them with “treasures laid up in heaven” (or just for believing what we believe you will receive a golden crown or at least a belt of gold [not to mention the possibly of young, unspoiled and nubile women]) that for a very tiny part of the time here on earth they just might learn how to do a few acts of unselfish kindness. (And that is asking a lot).

 

The first task of any religion (or mythology for that matter) is to teach the awe, wonder, and mystery of being alive, that life is both horrible and wonderful at the same time.  (Joseph Campbell)

 

Religion is the opiate of the people and communism works best in countries where the middle class has not yet fallen victim to the addictions of leisure, freedom, and a chance to fight for justice.

 

No, very clearly those people in white shirts and ties who come to your door want only two things from religion—1. spiritual security and 2. “a community.  If you are after the truth of the universe or genuine wisdom you will have to look outside of conventional religion.

 

Religions are all the same.  (RamaKrishna after spending seven years practicing in each of the major religions).

 

Religions are all different.  (W.M. after thirty years of projecting his mind inside of the main leaders of each of the major world religions.)

 

You should not try to change to another religion than the religion you were born into.  Just add a universally spiritual (but neutral in terms of belief) system to the religion of your birth in order to expand your awareness.

 

If you have played the game Civilization you know that religion is an upgrade to the advancement of civilization.  For example, fanaticism is an upgrade over warlords because it gets your army to fight harder for less cost.  And Monotheism reinforces the rule of law, enables an integrated state religion, and enhances morality in a way that increases literacy and productivity.

 

Religions are popular to the extent they guarantee their practitioners divine help in fulfilling the desires of the three lowest chakras, namely, the desires for wealth, for strong families (including a wife who will obey you or at least be bound to conventional morality), and for social acceptance.  (Joseph Campbell).

     If you wish to acquire the expansions of awareness such as the empathy of the heart chakra or the wisdom and intuitive insight of the third eye you will have to go on a spiritual quest or journey. (And this was the whole point of the Arthurian and Grail legends—you don’t get spirituality in a church.  You have to get on a horse and ride off.)

 

How can you miss something so simple as this?  “God is near; He is within each of us.”  Therefore let us treat each other as brother and sister, as mother and father, as son and daughter that the Divine Presence might be honored, respected, and celebrated.

 

Religions involve extremely complicated and intricate combinations of accidental and necessary historical events that shape their formulation.  In truth, all religions are about one or more of the following divine ideals: love, wisdom, power, and justice.  All rituals, doctrines, lineages, and ecclesiastical hierarchies are but an attempt, no matter how insipid, to make these four ideals real.

 

Religions subtly intertwine the positive and the negative often without any capacity for self-reflection that could discern the negative within their own actions.  Consider faith and conviction, qualities associated with the cosmic letter K.  Faith and conviction reveal dynamic ways of moving into the future with great creativity and ingenuity.  But with a negative slant, faith and conviction become an advanced form of psychic vampirism that like fire feeds on others’ emotions and devotion in order to reinforce its own power base.  Is the televangelist preaching the Gospel or is he hypnotically suggesting that you write out and mail in a check through clever manipulation and emotional enticements?  Certainly we witness both the positive and negative in all levels of all religions. 

 

“Everybody wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die.”  (Domino Harvey)  Well, I guess she said it better than anyone—belief can be fun; its putting belief into action that’s a bitch.

 

 

The best way for women to master the magnetic fluid (the psychological, spiritual, and universal essence of femininity) is to gain familiarity with which of the following meditations or procedures:

 

Sit down and talk to other older women about their experience with love. (See American Quilt) (I have spent at least thirty hours talking to my mother about the twenty five men she dated in college, why she married my father, and what resulted; for example, she would never have dated a guy named Jerold Ford, captain of the football team who sat next to her in class and later became president of the U.S. because “he was a nobody.”)

 

Meditate on the undine/mermaid Istiphul, the most beautiful creature on earth.  Because, if anything, Istiphul is a grand master of the magnetic fluid.  Other undines are also great such as Isaphil who embodies water and lunar serenity.

 

Project your mind into the Dalai Lama’s heart chakra, which is a sea of compassion of cosmic dimension.

 

Of course there is Mother Mary on the inner planes.

 

And Christ has a love and compassion embodying divine being; just ignore the history of Christianity which took the wrong turn.

 

Gabriel, who impregnated Mary according to the Gospel of Luke, is the archangel in this solar system in charge of divine sensuality and obviously eroticism and who oversees “the birth of new light on earth.” 

 

The blue green, watery cosmic letter M, the “mother letter,” that embodies the essence of universal water and magnetism, especially working on the astral and physical plane.  (See my essay, Problems in the Study of Magic, Part III: The Magnetic Fluid)

 

Immersing your hands in a bowl of water each day and identifying with the water surrounding your hands.

 

Meditating on the sea, the life within it, and becoming the sea from continent to continent, from pole to pole.  As Istiphul once put it, “In your soul waves roll five thousand miles and magnetism flows between the poles.”  Sometimes you just have to pull out all the stops and really love what you are doing.

 

The Goddess of the Earth, the earth mother, etc. The Hopi Indian medicine man was unwilling to teach anyone.  So I evoked the vibration of the earth mother in my aura and in the next moment, without commenting on the meditation, he began teaching me.  That was in 1975. 

 

In the screenplay, Fall of Atlantis, the Goddess of the Earth asks Le’ah’e, “Do you wish to shine with my light and be anointed with my beauty?” Le’ah’e says yes.  The Goddess goes on, “Then two things I require: establish justice upon the earth and do as my Beloved and I do—make the world new.” “How do I do this?” asks Le’ah’e.  The Goddess replies, “Create a religion without priests, temples, or rituals in which love, power, wisdom, and justice are equally honored and pursued.” 

     I imagine the life force of the Goddess is within and sustains every living being.  You just have to get inside that.

 

Then again, one of my favorite, the Great Feminine also called the cosmic void that contains all the stars and galaxies.  Though utterly empty, without form, without thought, without substance of any kind, receptive to the extent of being a physical component of all-embracing love or omnipresence (and also like Prajnaparamita, the mother of all the Buddhas), it has brought forth life on all planets on all worlds throughout the universe.  But then again, you’ll have to be “madly in love with the universe” to pull off this meditation.

 

 

Spirit guides.  I know, I know, most people are thinking of a spirit on the inner planes, perhaps an Indian medicine man with an eagle feather, a guru with a turban, or a Tibetan lama with a vajra, etc.  I have a little time to write here at the terminal before they call for my flight.

     Well, “Now for something completely different”—how about we make up our own?  I mean you have been practicing Bardon, right? And you are at least on the level of a freshman at the Magical University.  Ok.  This is a pop quiz.  Imagine you are on a beach.  One half second and I can hear the roar of the waves, feel the spray on my face, the taste of salt on my lips, the smell of ocean air, the feel of sand between my toes, and the heat of the sun on my face and nose.  Not to hard?  How about this?  I imagine I am at the Arctic Circle and within a half second my body involuntary shivers from the cold.  Or this?  A TV in front of you and switch through ten channels spending a few seconds on each and see and hear the different people and voices speak.  No problem?  Ok, we are ready to begin.

 

You remember the movie, All That Jazz?  Our musical director had a muse.  She appeared to only him and carried on a total life review.  Flirtatious, intimate, sweet, she knows your every thought and feeling.  She laughs and jokes with you about your folly.  You can smell her scent, feel her stands of hair across your face, her fingers on your skin.  Now travel with her though some of your more “interesting” life experiences.  What is the past like when you relive it with her by your side?  She whispers in my ear with her arms around my shoulders, “Its ok,” that time I felt I had died while still alive. 

And another time she says, “This was one of your worst” as she sits next to me, holds me, and enchants me as I gaze into her eyes.  It was when I lost something I will not be able to replace until my next life time.

And you know that kind of loneliness so deep, so cold, so abandoned and alone like a field of wheat or corn destroyed by a storm and so left waiting for the first snow to fall. She is there at my side--“Your spirit can not fail you with me as your spirit guide.” I agree with her a hundred per cent.  Now if I had only had her back then I would be where I am now a few decades sooner.  Well, not bad for a start and at this point we are only doing art.

      

Now part two, maybe something a little more seductive (to hold your attention better).  Ok.  Like a supermodel of your own choosing.  Don’t be shy.  You are free to combine kind of like Al Pacino in the movie Simone.  But just to keep it “spiritual” add a touch of Saturnian wisdom. 

How? Well, that sway of her hips—it uplifts rising upon the air as a breath on a path of love flies on wings to the heart of God.  Never thought of the sway of a woman’s hips in that way?  Try this.  She bends your head back and gives you a kiss. Your entire life, every desire, is raised to a new height and simultaneously every desire is assuaged; to kiss her lips is reason enough in this moment to justify why you exist (can you feel that?); you rest your head on her lap and your identity dissolves as you hear the Song, the Song of Wonder that sang the universe into being.  You see the sun and the earth and a billion years unfolding.  You become the seas and every living being: 

“I have entered a place where men are forbidden to go,

a place of the soul

A wilderness unknown

Where breath can not flow

The heart can not seek

But it is clearly seen as she dances for me--

Her hips and thighs

Caressing the air